Garden Railings

Garden Railings... they seem fair enough, almost innocent, most people have them. Well thats what they want you to think.

The silent killer?

Just The Facts

  1. Most garden railings in the UK have an ornate design pattern on top
  2. These are often in the shape of a spear
  3. Spears are designed to stab and kill people

See the truth people.

You're going to think I'm talking shit at first, but stick with me. This article is not for laughs, I have written it merely to try and point out one of the last barbaric practices of wester society. We put death spikes on the entrance to our homes. If somebody tries to intrude on our property we have set a crude and brutal death trap to impale them. If a thief climbs over, they will either end up paralyzed for life or die a slow and bloddy death.

You wouldn't protect your house with two swinging logs of death, so why garden railings?

I mean come on, what are you? A man or a fucking ewok?

Top 10 Most Sinister Things in the World

1) Aliens staring through your window at night

2) Garden Railings


4) Fog

5) Large Cargo Crates

6) Letters written in Blood

7) Zachary Quinto

8) Headless Dolls

9) When children start talking about their "other parents" who died in the 18th century.

10) Marmite

Do the world a favour, get rid of these evil evil things. Have you seen that film with the bed that kills people? Well garden railings are ten times worse. They could have their own horror movie.

I actually took time to do this. Thats how much I supportt the anti-railings cause