Gene Simmons

KISS is the answer to the question: What would happen if Donald Trump was the lead singer of an average band. Gene Simmons is the Donald Trump in that analogy, and he's done startlingly well for himself ...

Just The Facts

  1. Gene Simmons was born Chaim Witz, in Haifa, Israel. At age 8 he moved to America and changed his name to Gene Kleine along with his mother, Florence Kleine.
  2. When he was looking for a stage name, he adopted the name of rockabilly singer Jumpin' Gene Simmons
  3. Gene Simmons has never had a drop of alcohol or tried any drugs in his life.
  4. Unlike the 4500-4800 women he's supposedly had sex with, who must have been liquored up like an old Vegas woman to bone the man.
  5. Seriously, he looks like a cross between a Jewish Lurch from The Addams Family and a leather shovel.

All the World's a Stage

Gene Simmons can be seen on his reality TV show Gene Simmons Family Jewels on A&E, a reality show which might have been interesting 30 years ago when Gene Simmons looked like thisKind of like this

His family consists of his girlfriend Shannon, his son Nick, and his daughter Sophie. When it first aired, many people tried to compare it to The Osbournes. However, it soon became apparent that Simmons wasn't a burnt out old man. His entrepreneurial instinct has led him to acquire a net worth from somewhere between $200-$500 million, making him more the Sharon Osbourne of his family.

How GeneSimmons looks at the world

The driving force behind KISS

For those musicians who are in the business for the sheer pleasure of the music, Gene is the definition of a sellout, although since he was never really about the music nobody really cares.

For those who are more interested in the business side of the music biz, Gene is a the epitome of success. KISS is the answer to the question: What would happen if Donald Trump was the lead singer of an average band. Not content to just make the standard band gear, Gene will find a way to put the KISS logo on literally anything, and make millions of dollars doing it. Here are just a few examples of this:

The KISS Diaper Bag

The KISS Kondom

The KISS Mr. Potato Head Doll

KISS Wine

As a note, Gene currently has his own wine, named "Genie In a Bottle" in production. It is set to be on the market within a year.

And as the original generations of KISS fans start to get older, they've taken that into account marketing Kiss Bingo ...

And finally, the Kiss Kasket

Which, as noted on the site, is waterproof and can be used as a giant cooler when not serving its primary use.

Genetopia

On August 12, 2007, Gene Simmons purchased an island in Turks and Caicos and named it Genetopia.