Californication

The Showtime show Californication is about a brilliant, but jilted writer, Hank Moody(David Duchovny). He struggles to regain the love of his ex-girlfriend and keep his fat-goth-whiny teenage daughter inline, all while getting huge amounts of pussy.

Please note Hank Moody.....yeah, you wish you were that cool.

Please also note - Hank Moody's Pussy Circle

Hank's daughter, she's fat, ugly, annoying and probably a hermaphrodite.

Just The Facts

  1. Hank Moody is the fuckin' man, if you don't want his life, you're a women....or gay.
  2. The only unbelievable thing about the show is the fact Hank doesn't have an STD, the only possibility is that his dick was transplaneted from Superman as a child.
  3. Eva Amurri (Susan Sarandon's daughter) is totally worth watching the show, her tit's are AMAZING, some higher power took It's time crafting those wonders.

Characters to Hate or Love

Runkle-Hate

Runkle is Hank's agent and friend. He is chubby, ugly and annoying. Basically Runkle is in the show to show that fat losers are capable of getting laid every now and then, always finding themselves in binding social situations and most often that not, are the ones with the nice paying jobs. If you don't know a Runkle, you probably are one.

Karen-Love

Hank's ex-girlfriend/ex-lover/ex-wassupposedtobewife is a pretty chill chick and hot. Hank knocked her up, they decided to keep the kid, but are separted. Karen puts up with all of Hank's fantasic womenizing yet still loves him, even though he seems to piss her off to great extents most of the time.

Lew Ashby-Love

Lew is also the fuckin' man, he is like Hank, but on crack. In the show Lew is a famous music producer who hires Hank to write his biography. Lew is more than a womanizer, he is a man slut, he sleeps with any chick he can get his hands on....or pay for. Lew also loves drugs, espacially cocaine, he also has a huge house, I mean, having this guys life to would be great as well, but I tend to stray from drug riddles prostitute fantasies.

Mia Lewis-Hate

Mia is a fuckin cunt. She is the daughter of Bill, a guy that Karen may possibly marry. Hank lacks said info in the pilot episode of the show, and he bangs Mia....BIG mistake. First off the whole daughter of ex-lover thing, second she's 16, third she uses the fact he banged her to black-mail him...often. Fucking her was possibly Hank's second biggest mistake (first biggest being his daugher). Mia is also really not that attractive, in my humble opinion, I mean her fuckin chin is like five atom lengths from her throat....YUCK women with no chin bother me and shouldnt exist in any way, shape, or form on this beautiful planet.

Why to Watch Californication

It's pretty simple, if you one of those people who isn't smart enough to follow a deep, thought provocting show like "Lost" or your too embarrassed to watch porn with your friends, this show is for you! Californication has a smooth storyline thats easy to follow, and keeps your attention, also David Duchovny does an awesome acting job and so do most of the other actors. Its only a half an hour long, and barely three seasons in, it woudn't take much time to catch up on. Most improtany Tit's and Ass, there is so much tit's and ass in this show, if your a man, its almost required you watch it. Trust me, you can be criticized by friends and family for openly watching porn in your living room, but you can't be criticized for watching big names act in a weekly, well structered, softcore porn. So take my advice, and watch the show, it will get the blood flowin' in the brain AND the dick.