The guide to Bullies, thugs, and rough necks.

The Bully Trinity

Just The Facts

  1. The first act of bullying was when Able gave Kane a wedgie. This sadly resulted in the first act of school murder when Kane killed him with a rock, which spawn a debate in rock control laws
  2. Corbra Kai...is base on a real group. They actully control parts of the goverment
  3. The Wet willy was created by Sir Arthur Peterson in the middle ages

The Guide

Little info about Your Guide

it may surprise most of you to know that I was a nerdy kid, and not the BADASS PUSSY MAGNET that you see today. But I wasn't always a sex machine to all the chicks. I was a bit URKEL looking

I mean Look at this goofy looking bastard
Your thinking FINNALY a black man I can beat
Well others thought the same

Anyone I end up getting handed a lot of ass whippings. This is why I will now help other young youths identify and categorize bullies. I will also help them deal with each one. These are the tecnique that turns me from that above into this...
Pretty big turn around isnt it folks. Well I will do the same to you.
1) Dealings with Bullies in General-
1) First Thing to learn is IGNORE your parents and authoritative figures advice with dealing with them

one such advice was make friends with the Bully because they say deep down a Bully is insecure. I never really whupped anyone's ass, but I got to imagine the feeling is pretty AWESOME. So I don't buy the insecure thing. Nor do I buy the making friends with them. That shit doesn't work when you're an adult. If someone mugs you, the cops don't tell you to make friends with them.

So I tried Reasoning with them. Appealing to their better nature, maybe use my wit. Funny Jokes doesn't help against a kick in the mouth or a hit with a chair. Yes I was hit with a chair.

I was in the locker room getting dress and
the guy screamed "HULK SMASH"
And then chucked a steal chair at my head

it was like the fight scene from EASTERN PROMISES accept it was set in a catholic school and no one could really fight.

What did help was when I fought back and punch someone in the face. That pretty much stopped it.
See you don't actually have to WIN the fight.
Cause School Bullies, and are animals who hunt easy prey. So they are going to try to attack someone who WON'T punch them in the face. Now you may get some Raging Bull mother fuckers out there where it wont work on.

I mean if Mike Tyson bullying you, I suggest you run or offer him oral. That isyour best options in making out of it alive.

That Said, every type of Bully need to be handled a different way

1) The Bruiser- This is your run of the mill thug Bully who uses his fist mostly to torture. They normaly can be found in the Parking Lot listening to Metal and wearing muscle shirts no matter the weather. The anger of this bully stems from the fact his father got him smokes for Christmas. He normally goes by the name of Biff, Moose or Brick. Like most hunting animals he normal targets the weak prey first. His fighting skills may not be that great. If this was a video game he would be a mid boss. He is easily threaten and angered. Do not smile at him or it been seen as a sign of aggression. Sometime he travels in packs which make the punch in the face method harder. So it may be smart to get him alone. Another method is to know a teacher near. You see most fights in school not a drawn out affair as you see in the movies. For the most part you two aren't doing back flips. So you pretty just have to get the first hit in to win the fight. Then a teacher breaks it up later. If you go to a long fight there is a fighting method I like to use. It's a 3 part structure. Kick to the balls, punch, and then run. It a 3 act structure that done me well. Now there an off shoot of this called street gang Bully. These not the dancing gangs from the movies but more of the shooting ones. To handle these run..run like hell.
2) Girl Bully/hot chick- They tends to be more verbal and physiological. What separates them from most male bullies is a general lack of empathy. Really the mind of the female high school student is a dangerous place. Think about it what but a demented mind that would find Angel/Buffy realationship ( A relationship of a statutory rapist and a girl who into necrophilia) romantic.. I mean read most high school girls facebooks, and myspace writings, Tthere you will have a mind of a sociopath. Dealing with a female bully if you're a guy is harder then males at time sense they can get pretty rough verbally with guys. See reason for this is all guys know that insults will get to the point that even the nicest man will punch you in the mouth. Girls know changes are they won't get punch unless you're dating Chris Brown. So there more willing to go for low blows.
If you're a girl fighting a girl bully it's different. Girls fights can sometimes get rougher then guys fights sense it's base on emotion. Guys fight each other, they do a few punches, someone falls down and fight is over. Heck you may even become friends afterward. But with girls it become like the fight scene in THEY LIVE,4 minutes longer then it need to be. Girls also tend to be more passive aggressive in their bullying where you don't catch the insults. So I find when dealing with them it best to go for a smelly vagina Jokes, it like when they go for the small penis ones with guys. If you a guy dont drop the C bomb right off unless you want to not get laid by the other female students.. Only use that for emergencies . If your a girl fighting another girl then bombs away Beware of her boyfriends that may beat you up. If you're a girl, then its mental war fare. Use the web and text message to spread rumors. Plan your insults ahead of time and strike hard when they come at you. If else fails... donkey punch
3) Rich Kid/Prep kid- This kid can be found in most meatball movies or as villains in most 80's romantic comedies. They normally wear the best clothes and drive the best cars. They have an air of class, mixed with a general douchness. The real life example would be the guys from the Hills or Paris Hilton. Now I know Paris Hilton and easy target,but you ever notice the tone of Paris Voice never changes. You know what other people who tone in voice also never changes, serial killers. Take from that what you will. They grew up rich with an air of superiority. They feel their success is god given. I blame The Secret for that. Because of this they tend to look down on the poor and weak. They tend to be more cerebral in their attacks not wanting to get their hands dirty. They let their henchmen do that. They normal travel with the packs of hangers on that laugh at all their Jokes. Their attacks tend to be more elaborate that takes a lot of effort
Take the scene from the movie Carrie for example. They dump a pig blood on a girl's body. Think about that. That takes time. You got to found a gallon worth of pig blood. And somehow set up the trap before the prom, and hope no one notice you carrying in a bucket of pig blood into school and setting a jigsaw like trap. Then you got to rig the prom voting so the nerd will win. Then you got to hope she stands in the right spot, and not inches away. Really if you're going to go to that much trouble, you're asking for a telekinetic ass whipping. Now the plan of attack against them may be hard. Cause their popular and tend to get women cause of their wealth. So it is hard to find ways to find weak points for attack. They also may be attractive do to hot girls liking rich guys. This cause least a 50/50 change the kid they have may be hot. The hangers on also make it harder, cause they laugh at the insults this bully makes no matter how lame their comebacks are, Physical attacks are hot due to their connections may get you in trouble. That why you have to fight them due quality of the insults more the quantity. See if you tell a really funny good, people will laugh even if they don't want to. Having a Bully friends laugh at them makes the jokes have more stings. Having people around you that are not part of their bully packs also makes other people more likely to laugh at them. Get them to toss a punch at you first and you can punch them back. Also it good to have insults plan for their crew
4) Popular Kid Jock- This combo of all the things above. He is attractive to the ladies, tough in the fight, smooth, popular and smart. This may truly be your greatest challenge. This is the boss battle, the Sagat of Bullies. They hang out in nice houses and fights in street fight competitions. This was shown in (the very accurate representation of high school) movie NEVER Back Down You much use all the skills presented above to take them down. You much have your insults and crane kick ready. Only fight this one if you have to. It may be good to have a crew of your own..Even if their nerds or rejects. The comebacks to their insults don't have to be great; you just have to have a good number of them. Quick verbal jabs, mixed with passive aggressive insults. Don't make the first move; defend to make messing with you not worth it. Show no fear or pain, they can smell it. You may lose some battle but I tell you this, you shall not lose the war. Write your pain in your facebooks if you much but don't show it on your face. Its all about your game face and not giving them a reaction they want. And most important of all,NEVER BACK DOWN!!!