Dirty Harry

Dirty Harry, a man so committed to the cause of justice that it consumed him. An incredible crack shot, put more people in the morgue than the golden gate bridge and rocked a tweed jacket on more than occasion. You heard right, Tweed.

Yeah. That's right. His gun is bigger than him. And you. And the horse you rode in on.

Just The Facts

  1. Dirty Harry was the reason criminals went straight.
  2. His partners average life expectancy was two weeks.
  3. He dressed like a charity shop but stomped ass like Sgt. Slaughter.
  4. He will kill you.

Inspector "Dirty" Harry Callahan

For those who haven't seen the Dirty Harry films, and are therefore unfamiliar with Harry, he is possibly one the most important film police officers of our time. Forget Murphy, tin can mother-fucker, and forget Time Cop too, because Callahan has seen it all and, on most occasions, shot at it. He was crazy, crazy for the blood of the criminal element of San Francisco, and shed it on an almost daily basis.

Comprising of five movies in the series, "Dirty Harry" was a gritty, hard faced success story straight from the uncompromising face of Clint Eastwood himself, recently preoccupied with shooting mexicans and authority figures in the wild west. A script declined by Frank Sinatra because the signature .44 Magnum was 'too heavy' for his injured wrist, Clint took the duties at speed and showed Frank what a real man looks like. It would go on record to become Eastwood's Signature role, turning the stereotype that he only shoots people from south of the border on it's head, he went on to shoot men of all races and creeds. Wonderful stuff, reprise.

Popular culture is now saturated with Dirty Harry knowledge and Trivia, references to his over bearing gun, gravel tone voice and no nonsense policing are in every film with Jim Carey, Warner Bros. cartoon and on every 50 cent album. That's how badass he is, 50 raps about him, or murmers into a microphone or whatever that inflatable money machine does in his spare time.

I love Dirty Harry like a Fat kid loves Cake.

"I love Dirty Harry like a fat kid loves Cake"

The most attractive thing about Ins. Callahan's approach is the need for justice, not law. Thousands of newly found 'Watchmen' fans endlessly quoting Rorscachs extreme right wing monologes on how everyone but him, and maybe Nite Owl, is a fucking asshole, should take note on Harry's demented but oddly humanitarian outlook. Criminals are criminals, civlians are civilians and cops are cops. Thats the way the world is, and Harry saw to it that every criminal got fucked in the ass by the the head of the B-wing at least once in their life. The only reason they wouldn't see jail is because he decided that they were worth a bullet or three, and blew them the fuck away. His servere disdain for authority and beuacracy sang the note of every working man out there and people raised their fists in the air when he treated everyone from scumbag junkie rapists to the mayor, a cold hard serving of 'Clint Eye'.

Justice is Served!

Harry may not have been the most subtle of police officers, often, as noted, employing tactics that are less from the S.F.P.D ettiquete manual and more straight from the pages of the old testament. His methods would bring a tear to the eye of even the most hard-ass cops on the government payroll. Hell, it brings a tear to the eye between truncheon blows and kicks to the body in the locked interview room. Well, they should even be in this country...

Dirty Harry, The toughest dude to ever wear a brown cardigan and elbow patches on his jacket. The hardest guy to ever shoot somebody with a harpoon gun and sneer at their mutilated corpse, then go write a fucking report on it to be on the majors desk by tomorrow morning. The roughest chap to ever compare somebody to dog-shit. He hates hippies, commies, politicians and beauracrats, left wing politics and the rules. Fuck man he is the rules. So he hates himself, his commitment to hate is that strong.

Fuck Chuck Norris, Seriously.