Gordon Ramsey

Gordon Ramsey is an award winning chef and restaurant developer, star of several TV shows, and, arguably, the most foul mouthed individual ever to take up a kitchen knife without the intent of burying it into his cheating wife's throat.

Gordon is wondering who the fuck you think you are.

He is about to fuck Lamb Chops up.

Just The Facts

  1. He cooks like Eisenhower fights : with furious wrath and curious sensuality.
  2. Gordon Ramsey's vocabulary consists of George Carlin's 7 words you can't say on television (yet he says them anyway.)
  3. Despite accidentally placing his penis on the stove numerous times (fuck Lamb Chops up, remember?), he has a fleet of children. Scientists say this is due to the brass and sheer scale of his balls.

Gordon Ramsey - The Man, the Chef, the Bastard

"You've got every right to be fucked off about it, because I would be if I cooked that shit."

Gordon Ramsey is a man known for deliberately and maliciously verbally beating those who are subordinate to him, and then showing him his testicles which are made of pure brass.

When viewed through the sexist lens of the 1950s, cooking is the act of a woman. As caregivers and keepers of the home, women were charged with keeping food on the table, and making sure it was delicious. That's a mentality that has persisted for fifty years, and it's evident that women are still on the path to equality, to breaking the glass ceiling and being equals both in the workplace and at home.

Too bad Gordon Ramsey already shattered that glass ceiling with his balls.

Ramsey took the inherently girly act of cooking and infused it with things men love most: eating, tits, and shouting for no apparent reason. Gordon Ramsey made cooking almost as cool as fucking the captain of the cheerleading squad.

Derived out of anger and substantial arm-flailing, Ramsey's method finds its efficiency in scaring the bejesus out of someone until they cook correctly. He follows the "my way or the get-the-fuck-out" school of thought, in that, if he doesn't like someone's attitude, he'll fire them... from their own restaurant.

His attitude, skill, and utterly terrifying disposition make Ramsey a man to be feared when he's got a cleaver in his hand... and not just because he's going to cook a roast.