Pulp Fiction

Pulp Fiction sports a cast of mischievous rascals, including Samuel L. Jackson as a hitman who acts like a sociopathic Amway salessman, Ving Rhames and Bruce Willis as Deliverance re-enactors, and Christopher Walken as. . . well, as himself.

Greetings.  My name is

One day we'll look back at this and laugh.

Yes, River Phoenix, heroin and cocaine CAN mix.

Just The Facts

  1. In France a Quarter Pounder with Cheese is known as a Royale with Cheese, while a Big Mac is known simply as Le Big Mac. This is important. Or perhaps not.
  2. Christopher Walken not only spent several years in a Vietnamese POW camp playing Russian roulette, but for two of those years he apparently did it with a watch up his ass.
  3. Do not assume the white powder you just found is cocaine; it MIGHT actually be baby powder, heroin, powdered sugar--or even SALT! The best way to revive a victim who presumptuously snorted said powder is to stab her in the heart with a hypodermic needle. Works. Every. Fucking. Time.
  4. "What" ain't no country Jules ever heard of! And he really wants to know if they speak English in What!
  5. Pulp Fiction is PROOF that the majority of the members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences are a bunch of douches: In 1994 Forrest Gump took the Oscar OVER Pulp Fiction for Best Picture.
  6. Instrumental surf music makes movies already cool, in-and-of-themselves, 49% cooler still.

The Girl, the Gold Watch, and Everything

Those who are even the slightest bit OCD will simultaneously laugh and cringe while listening to Christopher Walken's monologue. As for us, we don't care how much sentimental value an object has, if we knew it had been up Christopher Walken's ass, we wouldn't even consider touching it--not even with John Holmes' ten-foot-pole. (Now if it had been up, say, Janet Reno's ass, well. . . wooo-hoooo!!!)

By-the-way, we were joking about that last part. (The part about Janet Reno, that is, not the part about Christopher Walken.) We just had to add something to fit "The Girl" portion of the section title (although some of us here suspect that Janet Reno is none other than Bill Gates in drag).

From left to right: Janet Reno, Bill Gates.

From left to right: Janet Reno, Bill Gates.

Starting at the Bottom

It is well-known by now that Quentin Tarantino has a female foot fetish. But Pulp Fiction, his second feature film as director, was his first to have specific scenes dedicated to focusing on women's feet, including a close-up of Uma Thurman's soles, Angela Jones' pedal-pumping bare feet, and a rather uncomfortable (for the viewer) discussion between John Travolta and Samuel L. Jackson about foot massages. (Hey, we're as open-minded here at Cracked.com as the next person, but even the very thought of Travolta and Jackson talking about that is. . . well, just creepy.)

What's That Spell???

Mr. Tarantino also has, apparently, a fetish for the "F" bomb. According to familymediaguide.com, the word, "fuck" (and its various derivatives), is used some 265 times, making it number 20 on the all-time Fuck List.

Yes, that means that there is an organization that actually counts certain words used in films, and compiles statistics on them. We can only wonder what sort of conversation Vince and Jules would have about that. . . .

Honor Amongst Thieves

Now we know that nothing spells comedic gold as much as one group of low-life thugs being ass-raped by another group of even lower-life thugs (think Deliverence, folks), but when you throw in ball-gags, a creepy mute in leather known as "The Gimp," a kitana, and a hella-righteous, balls-to-the-walls speech about getting "medieval" on a redneck's ass, well. . . let's just say that it makes Deliverence actually look like a serious drama by comparison! Oh, will the funny never stop???