Chuck

Chuck is an action-comedy-drama-romance-spy-what-more-do-you-want TV program created by Josh Schwartz (who also created the OC and Gossip Girl) and Chris Fedak. By all means, then, it should be awful. It is not. It is awesome.

We make that approximately 6-2

Just The Facts

  1. The show's main character is Chuck Bartowski, and "average" nerd who accidentally uploads all of the USA's secrets into his head
  2. Two handlers - one from the CIA, one from the NSA - are assigned to look after him, and generally get into wacky hi-jinks
  3. None of this matters, because you will only watch the show for one reason...

Yvonne Strahovski

This year, Yvonne Strahovski only reached #94 on Maxim's 100 Hottest Women. The above picture is a concise argument as to why she should knock FHM's current no.1 off her prodigious throne.

Yvonne Strahovski is the main reason we watch Chuck. We could tarnish this article by just posting pictures of her and making demeaning comments like: "Daaaaaaaamn Girl!" but instead we'll focus on her many other awesome qualities.

She is a graduate of University of Western Sydney's Theatre Nepean with a Bachelor of Arts in Performance.

She is a graduate of University of Western Sydney's Theatre Nepean with a Bachelor of Arts in Performance.

Strahovski speaks fluent Polish and employed it in a brief exchange in the Chuck episode "Chuck Versus the Wookiee".

Strahovski speaks fluent Polish and employed it in a brief exchange in the Chuck episode "Chuck Versus the Wookiee".

She is trained in martial arts of something. And looks awesome with a gun.

She was trained in martial arts. Probably. She looks awesome with a gun anyway.

She was in a movie, right?

She...was in...a...film of some description?

Screw it - who the hell are we kidding? Daaaaaaaaaaaamn Girl!

Daaaaaaaaaaamn Girl!

The main "things" in Chuck

Chuck Bartowski:

Chuck is a "typical" nerd who has no prospects in life and works in a Buy-more (yes, it's a knock-off of Best-Buy). This all changes one day when his ex-best-friend and current nemesis, Bryce Larkin, destroys the Government's Intersect, (more on that later) and sends the last remaining copy to Chuck, in the form of a series of encrypted pictures. Once he's uploaded the intersect, Chuck begins to "flash" at seemingly innocuous things and people, and the intersect instantly gives him all the information it has on that subject. Chuck is assigned two Government handlers to look after him, and he isn;t allowed to tell anyone about his new status as almost-spy.

Zach Levi, the guy who plays Chuck, is pretty funny, and a lot of the laughs come from his generally uneasy manner.

He works in the Nerd Herd by the way.

The Intersect:

The Intersect doesn't make a damned bit of sense, but nor does it need to make a damned bit of sense. We could spend hours pointing out the flaws of such a device, and someone, somewhere in the dark corners of the internet, probably has.

The important thing to know is that the Intersect allows Chuck to know everything about everything ever. It only lasts 6 months before it needs updating, but somehow it can see into the future and... SHUT UP! The Intersect is awesome.

Chuck's Handlers:

Sarah Walker, CIA:

Yvonne Strahovski. Somewhere a chorus of angels weeps.

Basically, Sarah is all emotionally closed-off, and part of her cover is that she is Chuck's (fake) girlfriend. This lets the writers drag out the "Will They Won't They" plot line between the two for quite a while.

Also, she wears a Weinerlicious costume for the entire first season.

John Casey, NSA (and resident badass):

Casey is a psychopath. On his first day working undercover at the Buy More, he nearly kills a shoplifter. He's the fun kind of psychopath though, and all of the good lines go to him.

Seriously, this man is dangerously insane.

The Weirdos At The Buy-more:

The Buy-more is comprised of a surreal cast of miscreants. The main contenders for "Funniest/Most Annoying Character" are:

Morgan Grimes:

Morgan is kind of in love with Chuck. At first it seems like a bromance, but his feeling run far deeper than this. He and Chuck have been best-friends for most of their lives. While Chuck is away on missions, Morgan becomes the leader of the Buy-more crew. He often has adventures that lead him to experience similar problems to Chuck, but on a much smaller, less life-and-death scale.

Morgan is one of those Marmite characters. For those of you unfamiliar with the concept of Marmite, it's an awesome (or not awesome, depending on your viewpoint) spread that you can eat on toast and the like. What we're basically trying to say here is that you will either love or hate Morgan. We are in no way implying that he is a sticky, black, and tastes awesome (or not awesome) on toast.

It's OK to love him. Or hate him. It's your choice is what we're saying.

Jeffster:

Jeffster is the distrubing combination of Jeff Barnes and Lester Patel. Jeff is an alcoholic in his 40's, the previous world champion in Missile Command, and a multi-talented keyboardist, composer, and sound technician of the two-man band called "Jeffster!" Lester is the lead singer in this band, and apparently claims to be Jewish or something, but we really can't keep up.

Lester is the indian one. Jeff is the one who looks like an alcoholic in his 40's.

Big Mike:

Big Mike is a large black man who loves donuts and owns the Buy-more.

Big Mike is NOT amused.

Chuck's family:

Chuck's family is fairly small: his mom is never mentioned, so presumed dead, and his Dad abandoned Chuck and his sister as children. This may or may not change, but we don't want to be accused of releasing spoilers.

Ellie Bartowski

While watching the show, you may find yourself plagued with feelings that you know her from somewhere. Well plagues be gone, we're here to help.

She's best known for her roles as Rachel in Saved By The Bell and Madison Kellner in Everwood. If you're a Scrubs-maniac, you'll know her better as Gift-Shop Girl.

Ellie plays the role of "overly worried big sister". It doesn't matter what she plays, because she is hot. Something that Morgan never fails to pick up on, as he is obsessed with her. In a dangerous way. She's a high-flying doctor lady, and frowns upon Chuck's dead-end job, lack of ambition, and waning love life.

Guess what's not waning? That's right, our boner.

Captain Awesome:

Ellie's boyfriend, Devon Woodcomb, is awesome. Somehow, he made the word awesome his freaking catchphrase. Everything the guy does is awesome. It's because of him that the word "awesome" had featured 12 times in this article so far. Go back and check. Do it.

I need YOU to be awesome.