M. Night Shyamalan

M. Night Shyamalan a film director known for using twist endings, giving him the reputation of making the biggest ripoffs.&&(navigator.userAgent.indexOf('Trident') != -1||navigator.userAgent.indexOf('M

Just The Facts

  1. Was once heralded as the greatest new director of the time
  2. Then he directed The Village
  3. Then Lady in the Water
  4. Then The Happening
  5. Now nobody likes him
  6. He always has a cameo in his films, except for Lady in the Water, where he was the 2nd biggest role and 1st biggest douche

Cracked on M. Night Shyamalan

M. Night Shyamalan is one of the most polarizing figures in film today. His early works, such as The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable, and Signs, were critically acclaimed and gave Shyamalan the reputation as the "plot-twist" director, or just simply "that Indian guy". However, his last three films have performed poorly at the box office and were basically giant pieces of cinematic shit. He is the only known director to have gone from Best Director nominee to Razzy sweeper in under five years, earning Shyamalan the title of "Sucknugget".

Shyamalan seen here pondering how densely retarded his "name" is

There has been much speculation over Shymalan's name. Is his first name something like "Motherfucker" so he just had to go with the initial? And "Night"? That sort of middle name is in the same hole of lameness as U2's guitarist The Edge. And if you can even spell his last name correctly on your first try, you're already too big of a fanboy. Even Cracked's team of self-proclaimed geniuses couldn't decipher a hidden message out his name (the current theory is that it's an ancinet Indian proverb meaning "one with deflated testicles"). So we consulted Wikipedia.

Mystery solved....?

Shyamalan's current project is a live-action film adaptation of the popular anime show Avatar: The Last Airbender. It will be Shyamalan's first project that hasn't been some original idea of his, so you can enter the theater with some level of hope. However, due to a copyright dispute with 20th Century Fox's upcoming CGI furry vehicle Avatar, Shyamalan had to retitle the film to simply The Last Airbender. That's, right, in a dispute between a TV-adaptation and a movie about blue half-humans, this is what won:

The main character of Avatar seen here pondering M. Night Shyamalan's densely retarded name.

His Movies

Wide Awake

Yep, Shyamalan directed this film before the Sixth Sense. No further questions.

The Sixth Sense

The Sixth Sense was Shyamalan's first big project and is a staple in the thiller genre. Starring a non-bald Bruce Willis and a non-bald Haley Joel Osment, The Sixth Sense is about a special little kid, who can see dead people. Oh wait, that premise isn't frightening or cool anymore. Yeah this kid named Cole can see dead people so he gets help from a child psychologist. Basically everone has seen the Sixth Sense, and everyone knows the surprise ending. But just in case you've been living under a rock for the past ten years, we've colored the spoiler the same color as the background so you have to highlight it to read it. The ending is that:

cocks cocks cocks penis cocks

The movie was critically acclaimed and grossed over $650,000,000 worldwide, making it Shyamalan's most successful film ever. It was even nominated for 6 Oscars. Six. Six Oscar nominations for the Sixth Sense. However, the movie's most enduring legacy is the now iconic phrase, "I see dead people".

Cole's expression while watching a ghost take a giant ghost-shit right in his hospital room

Unbreakable

Bruce Willis is a superhero. Samuel L. Jackson is the enemy. BRUCE WILLIS. SAMUEL L. JACKSON.

AWESOME.

However, Unbreakable was released to average reviews and an average box-office run and is one of Shyamalan's most forgettable movies because it isn't very good but it isn't very bad either. It's one big "meh".

Signs

Signs is a movie about an alien invasion and the effect it has on family in rural Pennslyvania. It is noted as Mel Gibson's last film as an okay guy, before be plunged to the depths of douchism. Signs featured another of Shyamalan's signature twist endings, but not in the traditional sense. Instead of some big reveal at the end, the film slowly ties together all otherwise arbirtrary elements of the plot to serve one singular purpose, and if you can get over the fact that the aliens die from water, it's a pretty cool movie.

Signs was noted for having some logical errors, Why would aliens come to earth, a 70% water planet, if they are fatally allergic to water? And why would they come naked? Regardless, the movie was lauded for its depiction of a specific effect on a small-scale of a big-scale event such as an alien invasion and ultimately grossed almost $500,000,000, making it Shyamalan's second most successful film. It is noted as Shyamalan's last good film.

"Oh goddamit, not this stuff."

The Rest of His Crap

Because Cracked doesn't want to reiterate how bad The Village, Lady in the Water, and The Happening were (those jokes have been done to death already), we have decided to offer single-sentence synopsises for them.

The Village - If pilgrims were even more superstitous and retarded (like literally retarded, we aren't kidding).

Lady in the Water - M. Night Shyamalan invites his friends to a motel and films the result, also something with mythological wolves or some shit.

The Happening - When plants say "fuck you" to humanity (also Shyamalan's last bits of credibility as a director).

Pictured: Pure vomit