Metal Music
Identifying metal genres is like identifying an STD-free hooker: complex and time consuming. But not anymore! Thanks to Cracked's handy Metal Genre Identifier you can rest easy that you will never accidentally enjoy a song from a genre you dislike.
Just The Facts
- Metal music or "Heavy Metal" is technically a genre of rock with roots in blues, punk and lots of drugs
- Metal is awesome \m/
- You know who never listened to metal? Hitler
Heavy Metal Subgenres
During metal's decades-long history roughly 8 billion subgenres of the music emerged, each with its own unique style, sound and obsessive fanbase. Veteran fans can turn to the opening Metal Genre Identifier to make sure they never deviate outside their preferred category of metal. But for everyone else, below you will find Cracked's quick guide to understanding how all of those genres work and why you've given up metal when you were 14.
ALTERNATIVE METAL (ALT. METAL) - Think System of a Down, when the band's message puts the lyrics and music in the backseat and violates them for a couple of hours.
BLACK METAL - Think Burzum, Immortal or Emperor, as well as hilarious costumes, shrieks, anti-Christianity and Satan. For additional information, refer to this video.
CLASSIC HEAVY METAL - Think Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, Black Sabbath; basically THE music people in polo shirts are referring to when they talk about "Heavy Metal."
DEATH METAL - Think Death or Morbid Angel. For its melodic equivalent, think Dark Tranquility or In Flames. Fans of Adult Swim should think Dethklok. Death Metal often deals with death, brutality and violence, though not as much Satan as Black Metal.
DOOM METAL - Think Pentagram or Saint Vitus. Slower and "heavier" than other genres. Basically "Funeral March" Metal.
FOLK METAL - Think Eluveitie, Finntroll or Korpiklaani: Metal with violins or other folk instruments.
GLAM METAL (HAIR METAL, POP METAL) - Think Motley Crue, Poison, early Pantera. Also think gigantic hair, tons of make-up and guys who stole most of their stage clothes from their moms.
GOTHIC METAL - Think Moonspell or Paradise Lost. It's... it's metal for goth kids. What more do you want?!
INDUSTRIAL METAL - Think Ministry or Nine Inch Nails. Metal for Generation Y (as in "whY were you ever born?")
METALCORE - Think All That Remains, As I Lay Dying or Killswitch Engage. All the melody of growl-y metal vocals with the guitar virtuosity of punk rock.
NEO-CLASSICAL METAL - Think Yngwie Malmsteen: when music school kids get their hands on electric guitars and an Iron Maiden CD.
NU METAL - Think Korn. Metal for people who don't like metal.
POWER METAL - Think Blind Guardian, Kamelot or Stratovarius. Power Metal often deals with fantastical, metaphysical themes and vocals so high only dogs can hear them. Bulk of the audience composed of Dungeons & Dragons fans.
PROGRESSIVE METAL (PROG METAL) - Think Andromeda, Opeth or Symphony X. Probably the most complex and ambitious metal genre, drawing inspiration from classical music and jazz fusion in terms of compositional structure, which unfortunately makes it the Hipster of metal.
SPEED METAL - Think Motorhead. Heavy Metal that is... like, really fast, man.
SYMPHONIC METAL - Think Haggard or Therion. Metal with lots of keyboards or other symphonic instruments.
THRASH METAL - Think Anthrax, Megadeth, Metallica or Slayer. The metal you were most likely to see on TV when people still cared about metal.
Viking Metal - Think Bathory. Viking Metal often deals with themes like the illusion of free will and the innate evil that all men have, rejecting the notion that human existence holds meanings, it tends to muse on the nature of infinity and immortality, as well asIT'S METAL ABOUT VIKING SHIT, GEEZ!
I would have to object to Metalcore being listed, as it always has been an evolution of Hardcore Punk, alongside Deathcore and Grindcore. That being said, the bands listed as examples for Metalcore barely even make the cut for Metalcore in the first place, let alone Metal.
ReplyYou see, much like Emo and Screamo, both of which were very real genres that branched off from Hardcore Punk, Metalcore and Deathcore started out as fairly underground genres full of great bands. ... The the terms caught mainstream attention, and the world was swept over by all these "Metalcore" and "Deathcore" bands that had literally nothing to do with the real genres. (Just like.. MCR has nothing, at all, to do with Gray Matter). As I Lay Dying, All That Remains? A bastardization of Metalcore, into what I call "Commercialcore". For Metalcore: Converge and Cro-Mags, Deathcore: Dead Horse (or should I say.. HORSECOOORE)
However, and it's sad that I have to say this, Metalcore is much more likely to be was those polo-wearing people think of when they talk "Metal", as Traditional Heavy Metal has been downgraded to Hard Rock by everyone who doesn't know a thing about Metal.
Same goes for Glam Metal and Nu-Metal, they're Pop Rock and overly-distorted Alternative Rock, respectively, that had the Metal label slapped on them to sell. And Alternative Metal isn't actually a real genre, and I don't know how such an idea even came into formation.
Also: For Viking Metal, listen to Legend's "From the Fjords", a Viking/Epic Metal album from 1979, and one of the best damn albums EVER.
its amazing.... your just so gay
HAHA, I love the definition of Nu-Metal.
ReplyWOOHOO ALL THAT REMAINS AND KORN RULE!
ReplyThis just proves how insanely pretentious and judgemental the stereotypical metal-fan is. No wonder it's so despised by the rest of pop-culture.
ReplyI hate having to pretend "Human" by Death isn't one of the best albums I've ever heard, cause when you talk about metal people immediately assume you're a stuck-up loser. And I don't blame them, because so many metal fans are stuck-up losers.
Metal is despised by pop-culture because, likes it Punk brother, it's anti-pop. Most Metal tends to promote free-thinking, not compromising, and advocates opening you mouth and saying "fuck off" to what you don't like and what is stupid.
We're assholes, not stuck-up losers. We're arrogant, vocal assholes. 49% mother f****r, 51% son of a bitch. Loud, rude, proud, and crude. But I could go on listing Heavy Metal slogans all night: If you can't handle it, you don't REALLY like Metal.
Wow, Anti-Godwin's Law. Impressive.
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesAlso, where does Disturbed and Five Finger Death Punch fall?
Faggot metal.
Disturbed is hard rock maybe alt metal and Five Finger is Nu-metal.
No, I agree with Seranum: knock-off metal is not metal
I'd say Disturbed is Nu metal or Alt metal and Five Finger Death Punch more groove metal
Eluveitie FTW
ReplyThe chart is kinda inaccurate, but hilarious nonetheless.
ReplyThe diagram is pretty spot on. Loved this article. And I love you.
ReplyVking Mtal. MANOWAR!
ReplyNu metal and glam f*****g suck dirty balls
ReplyWHERE IS THE GROOVE METAL?!?!? At least f*****g christian metal isn't here. Metal and christianity don't mix well.
Reply Hide All See All 5 RepliesMortification's first album, Incubus / Opprobium, Theocracy, Believer, Antithesis, the Unblack Metal "genre" which has several good bands... just as awesome as any non-Christian band.
"Christian Metal" is not a genre, but there are several good bands that just happen to sing about Christianity...... even if most bands that write about this aren't pretty good.
I'm no fan of Christian lyrics FYI, but good bands diserve credit. Just saying.
Sorry, but 'Christian Metal' isn't metal. It just isn't. Just like processed cheese isn't really cheese.
Didn't that whole Metal=Satanism thing die out in the 80s?
Kalmah has pretty christian lyrics at times, and is a pretty known death metal band.
'80s Christian Metal is generally some of the best... Just listen to Trouble's "Psalm 9". Biblical themes make for the best Doom Metal lyrics, and Trouble proves it.
And I'm as Atheistic as most, and as vocally against religion as Lemmy. You see.. Metal has the whole "Fantasy" genre down, whether it's real fantasy, or fantasy turned into an elaborate belief system that is about 2000 years too old.
You know, I was half cocked coming onto this page ready to blast you for being a dipshipt... but this is pretty f*****g spot on! kudos bro
Replysame here. I expecting them to be hating on any music that wasn't pop or rap.
I thought pantera was southern groove metal? Anyways, lol nu metal, for people who don't like metal XD and also, what category is Bison BC in? Is it extra delicious metal?
ReplyPantera in the early days were glam but changed to groove
What the f**k do you mean with: THE music people in polo shirts are referring to when they talk about "Heavy Metal."
ReplyWhy is half of my comment gone. This crap has to stop Cracked.
Because lame-ass, preppy douche bags usually don't even seem to recognize the existence of the really hard metal subgenres; classic heavy metal is enough to scare them away.
WHAT?! NO NIGHTWISH? I am so disappointed in this!
ReplyYou included f*****g Alternative Metal, Nu Metal, and Metalcore, but NOT Grindcore? Whaaat? But most Grind is more Punk anyways (Deathgrind, however, is a different story)...
ReplyThis page used to be so much better but some dick fucked it up and completely changed it
ReplyAnother thing about Metal is how everyone despises every other genre that they don't listen too.
ReplyCheck any YT comments for proof.
That's because there's a reason I don't listen to certain Metal genres, but love others =)
It's mostly from people overthinking s**t anyway.
INCLUDE AUGUST BURNS RED AND PARKWAY DRIVE IN METALCORE THANK YOU
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesParkway is more hardcore imo
No, Parkway is more metalcore. Hardcore is Gallows, Cancer Bats, United Nations, Misfits etc.
not trying to be a dick, but as someone who was raised on punk and psychobilly, "Misfits" is not "hardcore" or any type of metal, they are and always have been horrorpunk, yes, its a genre, look it up.
Why bother? Metalcore is s**t emo music to begin with
Isn't Linkin Paark Nu Metal? They don't suck.
Reply Hide All See All 7 RepliesYes they are Nu/Industrial Metal. And THEY f*****g SUCK.
They basically rap. LP sucks.
Yeah we all know Nu Metal isn't metal. But the real point here is: THEY SUCK.
LP sucks pretty damn hard. It's a mix of the bad music of Nu Metal and angsty emo lyrics.
LP really really sucks. Idk how it's considered metal. Maybe it's in the bitch-metal category along with BFMV.
It's rock/rap, and yes it sucks.
It was okay when you were in middle school, or even if you're only talking about their first album, but they're still whiny and suck.
Depends on your tastes.
Honestly i think their early albums (Hybrid Theory) Rocked, but they did start to degrade wich is why people are starting to hate on them.
\m/ for u bro!