Solid Snake

The hero of the twenty first century, an age where man has decided to make nuclear weapon wielding human piloted bipedal war machines, only to sacrifice free will to Skynet. Yet for some reason he never killed anyone, unless you suck.

5 Hour Energy? Please...

True fact about terrorists, they are incapable of percieving cardboard and anything inside it.

Just The Facts

  1. Solid Snake + Cardboard Box = Invisible (So the reason why he has a million dollar plus active camoflauge suit must be due to underspending on pure badassitude.)
  2. Morals are important, this is America dammit, we don't kill the enemy, we just tranquilize him and let someone else no ever talks about deal with them from there.
  3. NO someone else is not CIA run extraterritorial torture centers. They just sleep forever until they die of old age.

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Do you see that exclaimation point?! That means you spotted Solid Snake out of the corner of your eye just now. You may have thought that was just a fly passing out of your peripheral vision, but in fact, you are very wrong. He's there in your room, and hopefully, he's just planning on how to choke you out in the most painful way possible. Hows that for a bad night? It's too bad that's only the case if he's already killed you once before, in which case you are probably enjoying a pretty shitty afterlife in the nine circle of hell where Solid Snake kicks your ass over and over again until he achieves ultimate perfection in the art of being the least lethal counterterrorist ever. Having Delta Force storm your room with flashbangs and putting a silenced 9mm round in your dome would have been a sweet release.