A terrifying exploration into the depths of consumerism.
Okay, so experiment time: I took two hits of acid and decided to pick a random topic I knew nothing about and just write free association as I researched and discovered. Here goes:
(Nick enters the website and is greeted by a loading screen made of soap scum. Not a good start.)
Whoa! Holy shit! There's like dragons riding lawn mowers in space and yet under the ocean! I'm feeling this too!
Just kidding. I may be tripping balls here but if anything this site makes me want to sober up and find a new career path. There's not much to say about it, it's a thinly veiled marketing ploy hidden deep in the crevasses of a 3D rendered armpit. Is it supposed to be fun? I don't see how it could be, so far clicking on the random chunks of deoderant flakes has only elicited harsh womanly screams and footage of a hairy fat dude rubbing his chest. I've had better luck hitting random on 4chan.
Mmkay...this time it's just a pile of poop that I can summon with every mouse click. Call me crazy but I think there's a pattern here.
Now a long loading screen. I can only imagine...wait...yeah it's another bad attempt to make me laugh and buy more Old Spice products. I found the pattern, guys!
Okay then, that's all I feel like doing on that site. Man, of all the things to do on acid this has got to be in the bottom four. To spite Old Spice I will now link to a more effective commerical for what I can only imagine is their chief competitor in the market.