The AK-47 is a kick-ass piece of flesh-ripper.

McMittens: Destroyer of Worlds.

All tresspasers will be shot down by Galndof.

*Jimmy it's time for dinner!* F*ck you mom, I am killing the Infedels!

Just The Facts

  1. The AK47 was invented by Mikhail Kalashnikov, a russian who got tired of tearing shit up with his bare hands.
  2. Bin-Laden may have purchased his first Ak-47 from America... please don't shoot me...
  3. 34% of the people you see in airports have these smuggled up their anuses.
  4. It is the most popular and mass-produced gun in the world.
  5. Ak-47 are the choice weapon for mass-murderers.

Who the hell made this mother-f*ckers?

Ak-47's where made by Mikhail Kalashnikov,(see links for more info), a Russian Soilder who got sick of having to blow the f*ck out of his enemys with rifles, a hammer and his 3rd testical. The Soviet Union ( being the basterds they are) decided to mass-procude his weapon and not give him a cent ($32 dollers in Russia at the time). Ever since the the world has made this mass-produced this gun a million times over.

Why the hell are they so awsome?

Ak-47s barley cost anything, are great guns for kids (please don't get your kid one for Christmas!), and can be striped in under a minute. Ak-47s are light-weight, automatic rifles that use 7.62x39mm type ammo, they have a range of up to 800 m =*0! Who the hell wouldn't want this gun? In fact, you should all know that it kicks ass, why did I explain it??? Oh yea, =3 I smoked crack!

Here is a list of things you can do with it!

1. Shoot the taliban!

2. Eat noodles with it!

3. Empress you crush!

4. Go, f*ck your self with it!

5. Shoot for fish!

6. Sell it for heroin... we at Cracked don't judge....

7. Rob a bank!

8. Rob a bank.... naked!

9. Shoot your bitch/bastard of an Ex!

10. Piss on your friend's dog! Then shoot it!

11. Give it as a birthday gift!

12. Shoot the Nazis'!

13. Shoot George Bush!

14. Shoot George Bush! Then take a shit on him!

15. Shoot George Bush! Then take a shit on him! Then throw him out the window!

16. Shoot Michael Swaim!

17. Shoot Michael Swaim.... naked!

18. Hack Ebay!

And the number one thing to do with an Ak-47 is.......

Commit a drive by after smoking a bag of weed and then punt small children as the Elderly remember the good old days.

Why is this article still going?


I don't know....




That is all....