Indie Music
The most important aspect of the indie music culture is discovering bands that nobody else likes. But how's an over-educated 32 year-old to decide between all of the weirdly named bands? Two helpful charts:
Just The Facts
- "Indie music" is a term most commonly associated with unsigned or minor label bands that have a folk/alt/rock/electronic sound.
- In addition to liking music that nobody else does, the one thing that unites the indie scene is a willingness to wear clothes nobody else would be caught dead in.
- The favored environment for indie music culture is festivals; however it can be found in clubs, thrift stores and Urban Outfitters.
Cracked on Indie Music
Indie music, and its surrounding culture, can introduce you to beautiful noise, give you a social life, touch your emotions, and if you are a guy...make it possible for you to court* girls that would otherwise be way out of your league. Yes...Indie music is kinda like magic in some ways....bearded magic.
*Indie slang for fuck
Fans of indie music, or "indians" as they like to be called**, are passionate about everything. They discover a life changing band three times a year, they are involved in a constant quest to individualize their look, and have to keep up with a hectic concert schedule. It's way more work than it looks. So let's take a deeper look at a few of the more important aspects of indie music and culture.
** not true and possibly offensive term
The first thing an indie music fan needs is a stable of bands to love. (See flowchart above for official process.) If you do not have time for the flowchart then use the shortcut method of basing your fandom purely on the band's name (see other chart above).
Once an indie fan has established a solid stable of favorite bands, the next step is to support / experience those bands in a live setting.
Festivals and Shows
These are the lifeblood of the indie scene. Depending on the level of dedication one can expect to attend anywhere between two and 20 shows a month. These shows will typically be in old theaters, outdoors, or in small cramped clubs.
Shows are decent for what they accomplish (i.e. seeing the bands you like), but they have many downfalls. They have time schedules, they are in a confined space, the acoustics of each environment are completely different so a band's sound can change depending on where they play, there are lines for beer and bathrooms, and the tickets are overpriced. They definitely lack the indie spirit that this scene craves. The cure for this is to attend the defining event of indie music; the music festival.
Music festivals allow fans to see anywhere between dozens and hundreds of bands spread over one or more days. They overcome all the downfalls of club shows except the lines, overpriced tickets, time schedules, acoustic problems...ummm...but did we mention that they are out-fucking-doors (usually).
and really fucking crowded...but in a good way......
There are far too many festivals to list here but it is an experience that every indie fan treasures. Plus if you go to one of the really big ones that have upward of 100 bands performing, you get the feather in your cap (another reason they are called "indians") of having a bomb to drop on your friends in the future. Because (and this cannot be stressed enough), having a friend mention a band to you and being able to respond with "seen em live" is the crowning achievement for indie music fans. To an indie, it feels like 100 orgasms covered in chocolate set to a Radiohead soundtrack. You would have to attend far too many small shows to gain the clout you get from going to one festival.
I'm sure by now you are a little irritated at the lack of follow up on the earlier statement about indie music leading to comingling with hot girls....
Cute Indie Girls with Ugly Indie Guys
When at indie shows and festivals one thing you will be struck by is the looks discrepancy within many of the couples. It is not at all uncommon to see cute girls sporting tight clothes and pixie hairstyles holding hands with what looks like a homeless man. The motivation for these girls to couple with such visually unappealing guys can vary from wanting to piss off their parents, all the way to really wanting to piss off their parents.
But the lesson guys everywhere need to take from this is: If you rank anywhere from ugly to average on the looks scale...grow a damn beard, hit the thrift store, get some glasses, find some bands to like and some shows to go to (see charts above)....then buckle up and enjoy the cute indie girl ride. Here are some convincing visuals:
beard + glasses + retro suit
All these two require of you is that you have shoulders
Just wow.
No more evidence should be needed.
why elliot smith i ask you, why?!?
ReplyHandsome guys = Sports, Acting v Ugly guys = Emo/Indie bands
ReplyIf you can pick up girls then you don't need to pick up a guitar, wear skinny jeans, wear eyeliner or have floppy, jet black hair.
Indie and emo douchebags just one step above pederasts on the creepy/pervy ladder.
I live in Mexico and is funny that the hipsters from here listen to U.S.'s mainstream bands like the strokes or artic monkeys (they are not "well known" here) and they feel as arrogant as his American relatives.
ReplyYou can make a whole theory about their behavior based on these facts.
I just listen to things that I enjoy. Does that make me a bad person?
ReplyOnly if you pretend that you don't care about what people think about the music that you say you enjoy but really only listen too because it's not mainstream.
I was totally into this article like a year ago.... no big deal, whatever.
ReplyYeah, it was better then. That was before it had sold out with all the Likes, and Diggs.
There ARE lots of bands without English in their names because... their members' preferred language is not English and/or they aren't from an English-speaking country. You must be overwhelmed by the prevalence of indie music when travelling abroad...
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesI think the author was just referring to the bands that only use a different language to sound mysterious or cool. They use another language for their name even if they have zero actual ties to that language or culture.
I bet there are bonus points if they don't know what the hell the name means, but it "sound misterious".
Ah, but the music isn't indie when you're abroad, it's only indie if they are playing it here.
Its the same thing with metal, rap, techno, pop, emo. To the people that like it it all sounds good. To the people that never really listened to it they immediately look at it s different and pass it off. There are credible musicians in every genre and people like different stuff. I don't know why nerdy kids that like hipster music get it so bad. Why dont people go after the real enemy, Dub-step.
Replymy buddy "hey u gotta listen to this new type of music its awesome!" me "this sounds like a dude rolling his face on a science fiction soundboard. pew pew lasers!"
Yo La Tengo FTW!
Reply"Indie music, and its surrounding culture, can introduce you to beautiful noise, give you a social life, touch your emotions, and if you are a guy...make it possible for you to court* girls that would otherwise be way out of your league. Yes...Indie music is kinda like magic in some ways....bearded magic."
ReplyI reeeeeeally hope this is all sarcasm
Does the Soundtrack to Raiders of the Lost Ark count as Indie?
Replyok..it shouldn't have, but this made me laugh XD
Ok, I have a lot of respect for Cracked, but you will NOT TAKE THE PISS OUT OF JIMMY EAT WORLD!!!!!
ReplyI don't think they took the piss out of Jimmy Eat World. Cracked just pissed on them, like everybody should.
Death Cab for Cutie is song by the Bonzo Dog Do Da Band, they were friends with the Pythons... not gibberish, should be put in a category that's missing which is named after songs from other bands, other examples would be Radiohead and at a stretch Panic! (At the Disco)
Replyjust what I was about to say!
Godsmack was an AIC song.
Yeah, I think sometimes the individuals that consider themselves "indie" end up severely confusing bands being "indie" with bands straight up sucking dick. While there are some actual "sell out" or "corporate bullshit" (or w/e the f**k they call em) bands or singlers in many genres that are basically manufactured cash cows for certain companies *cough*disney*cough* (Then again, whatever they churn out can barely be considered real, actual music or musicians anyways), the fact is that a very large portion of bands make it big because they're shockingly, you know, actually appealing to listen to, not because they sold their souls to the corporate devil or something.
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesHell, on top of it even if one needs their profound music fix or something, there are still bands like, dare I say, Tool and such out there that lots of people have heard of, are highly musically talented, generally strive to have profound lyrics, appear to legitimately go their own musical direction, and in the case of that specific band you barely see em in person cause they don't do interviews most times and do concerts where the stage is usually really dark and you can barely see the members; There are bands out there like that, and they don't have to suck ass at making music to be profound or not be influenced by "mainstream" opinion.
Oh, and one last thing...Most every band started out being relatively unknown, but in the large majority of cases they got big because people liked them, not because some huge company decided to sell the s**t out of em. On that note, I've got a news flash for the indie or w/e fans with their obscure usually s****y bands: If the bands "indie" fans listened to didn't suck, they'd probably get offers get bigger and bigger opportunities and venues and 99% of the time they'd take it just like all the other bands that started out that way and now are "corporate bullshit". The only difference is that bands that strive to be "indie" pull the classic "If I'm too terrible to succeed, I'll just pretend like I don't care and I'm not even trying" routine to cover up the fact that they're actually terrible musicians. That way dumbasses will come out and pay ridiculous prices to see bands that should be embarrassed to even be seen holding an instrument let alone god forbid getting paid to do so.
Next thing you know someone's going to hand a group of infants a set of pots and pans to bang on, set em on a stage, then call that s**t art and charge a bunch of morons that consider themselves "artistic" or "indie" to come in and watch it and go f*****g nuts telling their friends about how sophisticated their tastes are, cause apparently for them it's a little like homeopathic medicine; the more worthless/the less actual substance there is to something, the better it must be.
On a completely unrelated note, nice avatar!
I can completely negate your entire "cream rises to the top" argument with three syllables: Nickelback.
What's your problem with underground bands? Some indie guy told you the bands you like are crap??
Look, I'm not an indie fan, but I am a metal fan. And from my own experience...... If indie fans aren't stupid, they should know if a band truly sold out or not. And if the sell out output was of good quality despite being more accessible, they wouldn't care.
Also, you're wrong. Very, very wrong. There are many, many great bands in the underground scene that don't make it big because they don't have any luck. Getting a f*****g record deal is not THAT easy and getting radio airplay is almost impossible. And having a record deal [or even being good with their instruments!] doesn't make a band any good at all. This works for every metal scene ever, and probably it works for indie music too.
Take the NWOBHM scene, for example. I [and many fans] like bands that are huge [example: Iron Maiden], bands that are somewhat well known [example: Cloven Hoof] and bands noone knows, except the obsessive fans [example: Shiva]. From that scene, Judas Priest is one of the bands that sold out the most, but they are AWESOME and I still like several of the catchy commercial tracks because they are f*****g fun to listen to.
However, in the mainstream you can find "metal" bands that are complete crap: Linkin Park, Limp Bizkit, Korn, Disturbed, Suicide Silence .... that are not only s**t songwriters, but also s**t musicians. You get where I'm going.
I love to use examples here. Have you ever heard of Ron Jarzombek? No? well, he's an extremely talented musician and songwriter, one of my favourite guitarrists. Does any mainstream metal fan knows him? NO. But all underground metal fans know and respect his music which is awesome!! God-tier progressive metal. Way better than Tool ;)
I rarely tell people about my musical tastes, unless they are fans of those bands theirselves. Noone f*****g cares about what I listen to, and I don't listen to that stuff to tell other people. I do it for MYSELF.
@morris_brown: Exactly, sir!
//////////// And a correction in my previous post: And having a record deal [or even being good with their instruments] doesn't mean a band is any good at all.
Your argument is invalid because you called Tool indie even though they're on a major label and are a metal band.
Here Yula, have an internet.
There are a lot of amazing obscure and semi-obscure bands out there, but they'll likely never make it mainstream just because they have a niche audience. On the other hand, there are some less talented musicians who make it big because the type of music they perform appeals to a lot of people. Talent isn't the only factor here.
Jimmy Eat World aren't indie!
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesThat's what I thought.
I always thought they were just a pop-rock band myself...
They started out as what's considered an indie band, but soon got more exposure and developed into the pop-rock sound we know today :P
I had an "indie" friend. I never had any idea what she was talking about. Turns out it was about crappy bands...I think. I used to think I was just stupid, but then I just realised...it was all random bullshit. Are all indies like that, because man it is disturbing.
ReplyAmazed there were no references to hipsters.
ReplyThis entire article is a reference to hipsters.
Hipster is implied
Isabel Lucas and Angus Stone should have been included.
ReplyBeards must be accompanied by long hair and have to be kept washed and combed.
ReplyOr baldness. But that is an exception.
Death Cab for Cutie come from a Neil Innes song from the 60's (he played Ron Nasty in the Rutles)
ReplyI need some glasses
Reply