New Zealand

New Zealand, also known in some circles as Aotearoa, is a small country in the Pacific ocean that is often mistaken for a part of Austraila. This is a common misnomer as New Zealand is not full of rapists, murderers or Russell Crowe.

Not Australia but has just as many sheep shaggers.

Behold the Wonderment of New Zealand! Eat up its beauty

Pictured: Typical New Zealanders solving a parking dispute

Just The Facts

  1. New Zealanders are also called kiwis, like the fruit, but not homosexual.
  2. New Zealand is so far away from you that the latest movie out is forest gump.
  3. New Zealand was populated by a native people called the maori before the whites came, they are still here they are just out the back...doing um..dishes yeah thats it

Famous New Zealanders

Anna Paquin: She is Rouge off x-men and recently stars in the HBO series "True Blood". I went to primary school with her and i always new that one day i would see her knockers on the tv.

Flight of the Conchords: A Comedy folk Pair that have had their own series on HBO. There is a guy i work with called jake that looks like Jermain from the show and I always say "hey Jermain" to him, i think he doesn't like it because he said if I called him that again he would hurt me with his hands.

The Guy That Invented that jetpack: He was on the news a while ago and he made a jet pack that was like a helicopter, it was pretty big and heavy looking but it was kinda awesome and i wouldn't mind one. I would totally strap some guns to that bitch and go Zombie hunting.

Zombie Hunting

Sorry did i forget to mention the New Zealand is the only country in the world where Zombies run free and wild eating brains and generaly shambling about the place like old men at a mall.

(Bloody Braineater!)

You would think that having Zombies about the show would pretty much kill the tourisim trade in New Zealand but that where you would be wrong you utter failure.

Kiwis have built a lucritive market out of this so called problem. You can for instance go Zombie hunting, Zombie herding, Zombie tossing, Ride the Zombie, Dancing with the Zombies, Howling like a Zombie classes and just recently it was discovered there is a lot of money to be made in Zombie prostitution.

"Whats the price love?" "Brains!!!!!!!!"

"whats the price love?"

"Brains!!!!!!!!!!