Omegle
Omegle is a website that sets you up with an anonymous stranger to chat with. It's basically like the half-retarded offspring if AOL Instant Messenger had sex with 4chan.
Just The Facts
- Omegle is essentially completely pointless
- It's filled with pedophiles and /b/tards
- You can basically fuck around with a complete stranger.
- In conclusion, because we can tell a stranger that we just boned Megan Fox while playing a guitar solo and they will never know, Omegle rules.
Cracked on Omegle
When you're on vacation, are you ever tempted to lie or completely mess with people because you know you'll never see them again? But you never do it, right? Omegle is like a vacation you can go on anytime and you can fuck with people to no end. It's also not like a vacation at all because Omegle is some website while vacations have kick-ass water slides.

Like Omegle + water + bikini babes + $1,000
However, Omegle can provide hours of extremely unique entertainment you really can't find anywhere else. It's like the scribblings on a high school bathroom stall except you're with the person in the stall at the same time.

Pictured: what we discuss as we shove a wet one out.
On Omegle, people can confide in others with confidence, lie to them for hilarious effect or just have a casual conversation about what deathcore-darkwave metal album they just torrented. Or, if you're like most people on Omegle, your sanity disappears completely when you start a chat and things start to go like this:

We think her name is Gwen. Not sure what she's here for.
On Omegle, you're all by yourself. You've got to defend your pride and your views because the internet is one giant alleyway in a bad neighborhood. On Omegle, it's on, all the time.

Oooohhhhhh snap
The Cracked-Omegle Experiment
While doing extensive research for this topic page, Cracked sent an editor to confront Omegle itself to see if he could bring in more traffic to Cracked's site. The results were not only disappointing, but terrifying.

He didn't answer :(

Hey what's with all the hostility?
Now for Omegle, some people were being pretty reasonable. They didn't want to deal with Cracked so they just left. But then a shitstorm of lunatics came on the radar and our editor had to be cunning and clever to convince them to visit Cracked. It's near redundant to say he failed.

So... three?

Some spelling errors are embarassing. Others are fucking hilarious.
Despite his best efforts, the editor hadn't convinced anyone to visit Cracked.com. We told him to be more aggressive and demanding to see if Omeglers would respond.

How did "manly and shit" not convince this guy?
Well that attempt didn't work. We told the editor to try one more time.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

FUCK! NOOOOOOO!
The people on Omegle are just too impatient. The Cracked-Omegle experiment had failed. Eventually, our team of network and behavioral scientists here at Cracked realized one important thing. No matter how polite, offensive, bizarre or just plain retarded, nearly every Omegle conversation ends up like this:

Simple enough.
At least Omegle isn't popular enough to warrant a complete takeover by 4chan right? That would be ridic-

Well it was nice knowing you, Omegle.
Follow the author of this topic on Twitter: @alexfurlin






Stranger: hi
ReplyYou: c**k Stranger: ?
You: a doodle doo
Stranger: i
Stranger: i dont get it?
You: c**k a doodle doo?
Stranger: you r a
Stranger: austrailian?
You: on a scale of 1-10 of retardness you go to 14
You: its a rooster
Stranger: well your the one who sais c**k a doodle doo
Stranger: how sould i now haha
Stranger: its a rooster
You: what f****n noise do they make
Stranger: the make like dupstep sounds i guess?
Stranger: wo u want to know this?
Stranger: wy\
Stranger: h
You: yeah sure i fart musicals dumbass
Stranger: why
Stranger: im just jokin
You: nah your just a silly old bastard :)
Stranger: they make like oeloeoe things ,
Stranger: wtf im not ols
Stranger: d
Stranger: im 40
Stranger: no im 16
Stranger: serious
You: yeah you are gone senile you dont even know your age
You: go way to a restin home you old bastard
Stranger: im 16
Stranger: i think that you r the old guy
Stranger: or woman
You: im 18 and im sure you thick pretend sixteen year old monkey licker
Stranger: O.o
Stranger: i think that your a child hahaha
Stranger: monkey licker?
You: yeah you lick their balls at the zoo
Stranger: your not 18
Stranger: well
Stranger: so\
You: your not 16
Stranger: how r ya?
You: im 18 im just me
Stranger: ok\
Stranger: that sounds weird
You: i can do wat i want you little underage s**t Stranger: hah
Stranger: so i believe me im 16 ^^
Stranger: you
Stranger: underage
You: ok you old c**t Stranger: wel i can so everything either
Stranger: i can smash things and stuff hahah and you cant :P
You: i can and drink have sex legally drive a car go into clubs box socials literary meetings what can you do?
your right hand thats what
Stranger: im
Stranger: im left handed
You: but you use your strong hand for the mouse make the weak strong
You: dont think it works for you
Stranger: huh?
You: yeah you dumbass
Stranger: ...
You: hey knock knock
Stranger: who's there?
You: disco
Stranger: disco who ^^?
You: disco nected you jackass!
You have disconnected.
Stranger: hi
ReplyYou: c**k Stranger: ?
You: a doodle doo
Stranger: i
Stranger: i dont get it?
You: c**k a doodle doo?
Stranger: you r a
Stranger: austrailian?
You: on a scale of 1-10 of retardness you go to 14
You: its a rooster
Stranger: well your the one who sais c**k a doodle doo
Stranger: how sould i now haha
Stranger: its a rooster
You: what f****n noise do they make
Stranger: the make like dupstep sounds i guess?
Stranger: wo u want to know this?
Stranger: wy\
Stranger: h
You: yeah sure i fart musicals dumbass
Stranger: why
Stranger: im just jokin
You: nah your just a silly old bastard :)
Stranger: they make like oeloeoe things ,
Stranger: wtf im not ols
Stranger: d
Stranger: im 40
Stranger: no im 16
Stranger: serious
You: yeah you are gone senile you dont even know your age
You: go way to a restin home you old bastard
Stranger: im 16
Stranger: i think that you r the old guy
Stranger: or woman
You: im 18 and im sure you thick pretend sixteen year old monkey licker
Stranger: O.o
Stranger: i think that your a child hahaha
Stranger: monkey licker?
You: yeah you lick their balls at the zoo
Stranger: your not 18
Stranger: well
Stranger: so\
You: your not 16
Stranger: how r ya?
You: im 18 im just me
Stranger: ok\
Stranger: that sounds weird
You: i can do wat i want you little underage s**t Stranger: hah
Stranger: so i believe me im 16 ^^
Stranger: you
Stranger: underage
You: ok you old c**t Stranger: wel i can so everything either
Stranger: i can smash things and stuff hahah and you cant :P
You: i can and drink have sex legally drive a car go into clubs box socials literary meetings what can you do?
your right hand thats what
Stranger: im
Stranger: im left handed
You: but you use your strong hand for the mouse make the weak strong
You: dont think it works for you
Stranger: huh?
You: yeah you dumbass
Stranger: ...
You: hey knock knock
Stranger: who's there?
You: disco
Stranger: disco who ^^?
You: disco nected you jackass!
You have disconnected.
ReplyYou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Question to discuss:
You're motter ist uh hore!
You: ur mother didnt teach u to spell
You have disconnected.
ReplyYou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Question to discuss:
who is that person behind you :O
Stranger: ur mom
You: my pillow :O
Your conversational partner has disconnected
ReplyYou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Question to discuss:
Why are Americans so dumb?
You: cuz of the president
Stranger: Why is the Hawaii 5-0 music so great?
Stranger: Dadadadadaa
Stranger: Dadadadadadadadadaa
Stranger: Dadadadadadaaa
You: batman~!
Stranger: Dadadadadaa
You: DADADADADADADADADA
Stranger: Dededededede
You: BATMAN!!!!!
Stranger: Well played sir.
You: hey guess what?
Your conversational partner has disconnected
ReplyYou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Question to discuss:
If an ant goes up mu butt, does that mean it's f*****g me? :')
Stranger: no
You: yes from the inside :O
Stranger: it just means you have a bug upi your but
You: its eating u
Your conversational partner has disconnected
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
ReplyYou: hey, im a girl looking for a good convo with another girl
You: :)
Stranger: sure ok
Stranger: yeah
You: u girl?
Stranger: yes.
Stranger: !!
You: I'm just tired of those dicks!
Stranger: um. how old arey ou
You: 17
You: u?
Stranger: same but
Stranger: i mean were you being serious
You: about what?
Stranger: "i'm just tired of those dicks!"
You: yeah them guys are assholes
You: on omegle
Stranger: huh...it's my first time on but so far sadly its true
You: I had one a few mins ago that I talked to for like an hour and then he said... ya horny? Like wtf dude?
You: lol
Stranger: yep well guys get horny fast lol but yeah that sucks. ruining a good conversation esp.
You: yeah its fucked up. all they want is nasty s**t i'm not into
You: so this is ur first convo on omegle?
Stranger: nope lots ended fast though
Stranger: it's been interesting
You: yeah haha
Stranger: people seem to just want to be entertained or their boredom ended
You: yeah lol. have u ever been on omegle vid chat?
Stranger: yeah it was scary
You: Why?
Stranger: so many dicks
You: All them weird guys wanking for the camera
You: I dont get why at all
Stranger: yeah it seems a bit pathetic or sad
Stranger: but like occasionally there might be a good conversation with that.
Stranger: idk talking is fun ya know
You: I mean I've met guys and we've talked for hours and we might talk dirty and show eachother things but they were actually cool not total dicks!
You: yeah haha i agree
You: lol my friend told me she got hit on by another girl, doesnt seem like the site for lesbians haha
Stranger: lesbians are more rare maybe or its mostly horny guys?
You: yeah haha. all i see is weird guys
You: i only have one convo decent eever on vid chat
You: thats y i do text now
Stranger: philosophical n stuff? o
You: confused :P
Stranger: oh the conversation on vid...was it philosophical and stuff or
You: i dont know what philosophical means lol
Stranger: like about life
Stranger: and the bigger picture
You: yeah sorta. not about dick and boobz lol
Stranger: o lord lol
You: hahaha
You: whas ur name?
Stranger: ava
You: Thats cool name
Stranger: yours?
Stranger: thanks :)
You: Luiz, i'm actually a guy. Some of us do know how to have a decent conversation with a girl without getting horny lol. And to the that jack off for the camera thats gross as s**t haha :P
You: are u gonna leave now?
Stranger: no...lol though
Stranger: whats your name?
You: Luiz
Stranger: luiz, cool where are you from?
You: Brazil but i live in new zealand. u mad i said i was a girl? :P
Stranger: new zealand!! woah!
Stranger: nah
You: Haha yeah. where u from?
Stranger: us :(
You: oh, dont u like it there?
Stranger: not really lol
You: oh lol. u shuld come live with me then :P
Stranger: are you in school ?
You: not right now. But i do go to school. Are u?
Stranger: yeah i'm on break
You: summer vacation is it called?
Stranger: winter
You: oh lol
You: its summer for me
Stranger: but seriously lol i want to goto nz
You: Haha u should :D
You: is it cold where u live?
Stranger: yes :(( rainy and windy
You: oh lol. where abouts u live? in us
Stranger: new york city
You: oh lol. Heard cool things about it
You: is it the big apple or am i thinkin of another place :P
Stranger: yep it is :P
You: haha cool :D
You: Was a a convinient girl?
Stranger: yes definitely
You: Haha awesome :D its a good way to get people to stay?
Stranger: i mean u could have told me u were a guy
You: and u wulda stayed?
Stranger: yes
You: oh lol. What abt if i told i'm actually 13
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Long comment is long.
My first chat on omegle is lucky - I found someone nice and we chatted for four hours. The next attempts? Not so much.
ReplyI talk on Omegle. Occasionally, you can find a normal person.
ReplyI want to get talked to by peedos =[
ReplyYou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
ReplyQuestion to discuss:
My balls, your face. Thoughts?
Stranger: Nice
You: you wish u had the balls to do that
Stranger: hahahah
Stranger: owned
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
ReplyStranger: Hey, are you a guy that would love to turn into a woman? :)
You: la la la la la la la
You: ELMOS LAND
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
or switch to video
Was this conversation great? Download the log, or select the log for copy-pasting!
I just laughed my ass off.
ReplyWho's the funniest? Robert Brockway, Michael Swaim, Daniel O'Brien, Seanbaby, Soren Bowie, Gladstone, John Cheese, Chris Bucholz, Ian Fortey, David Wong, Cody Johnston or Ross Wolinsky?
ReplyStranger 2: I don't think any of them are funny.
Stranger 2: Maybe Seanbaby.
Stranger 1: dont know any of them lol
Stranger 2: They write for... not CollegeHumor, but the other site...
Stranger 2: Meh.
Stranger 2 has disconnected
look@him, troll is staring to make verbal sense in his chat (yeah, there is just only guy behind it, although he may match up random users with random users, but mostly we chat with this troll) / btw his mission is to trade naked pics via for example specklebelly mail address:
Replytoday's (27/07/2011) intro on the site "Omegle is a great way of meeting new friends. When you use Omegle, we pick another user at random and let you have a one-on-one chat with each other. Chats are completly anonymous, although there is nothing to stop you from revealing personal detail if you would like."
chat:29/07/2011
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: change introductin coz this one is a lie
You: mostly
Stranger: yeah
You: this: When you use Omegle, we pick another user at random
You: and this: Chats are completely anonymous
Stranger: but if you tell your introduction,one can harm or cheat you.
You: i said change
You: not answer
You: so
Stranger: i am man from Pakistan
Stranger: hehe... seems funny
Stranger: isn't it?
Stranger: hbu?
Stranger: will u=tell anything...or you are boring person who making s**t all the time.
Stranger: your s**t is changing introduction.
Stranger: you are addicted to internet and waste all the time in internet...
Stranger: people are here to interact with different age and cultures...not to tolerate your shits
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
-.-
'Stranger: you are addicted to internet and waste all the time in internet..." - he loves to talk about himself (+ 'trade pics') as his way of life he's chosen exhibitionism :-)
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
ReplyStranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: ur hot
You: thanks
Stranger: u horny
You: not really
Stranger: ok
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
ReplyYou: im a girl lookin for a good convo with another girl
Stranger: yayyyy! (:
You: are u a girl?
Stranger: No..? Haha yeah
You: im just tired of these dicks
Stranger: Haha FORREAL!
You: guys just assume i want to sext them when i kno theyre ugly
Stranger: hell yahh! I had one a few mins ago that I talked to for like an hour and then he said... ya horny? Like wtf dude?
You: i kno!!! all they want is nasty s**t im not in to, u ever met a decent guy on here?
Stranger: Yeah a couple times but they all live way out haha, no reason to even try /:
You: yeah i kno wat u mean, u ever vid chat?
Stranger: yeah, skype(:
You: i mean on omegle because ive heard nasty things about it
You: this is my first nite on here
Stranger: Oh there's some nasty shit! Men will jack themselves off on camera! That's f*****g gross!
You: i dont understand that at all
Stranger: I mean I've met guys and we've talked for hours and we might talk dirty and show eachother things but they were actually cool not total dicks!
You: lol my friend told me she got hit on by another girl, doesnt seem like the site for lesbians haha
Stranger: Bahahaaa! That's funny! What's your name?
You: trisha
You: urs?
Stranger: My names blake and I'm a guy, were not all total dicks.. some of us know how to have a conversation. And those guys who do show their dicks. That's gross as f**k
You: hahahahahha my name is david
You: hahahahahahahahahahaha
Stranger: Hahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhaha
Stranger: hahahahahaahahhahahahaha
Stranger: Dude what's up?
You: we just had a convo as girls lmao
Stranger: Hahahaha were pretty damn good at it!
You: dude u totally had me fooled
Stranger: Same here hahaha! Haha so I'm 17 and live in south carolina haha
You: im nxt to u in TN and im 18
You: is it weird that i was about to hit on u lol
Stranger: That's funny as hell dude, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah no shit?!
You: yeah dude this is the funniest thing i have ever been apart of by far lol
Stranger: Hahahahaha, I saw it and was like this is too easy! Hahahaha
You: im gonna share this convo with the world lol
Stranger: How? Hahahaha and go for it!
You: facebook and blogs man, but im gettin off
You: peace
Stranger: Aight man later!
Katy? you didnt post it :P
ReplyYou're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
ReplyStranger: i
Stranger: hi
Stranger: from
You: space
Stranger: yeep me 2
You: cool
Stranger: im from mars
Stranger: u?
You: Uranus
Stranger: ohohoo COOL
You: omg! i wanna move
Stranger: move to mars
You: Mercury sound nice
Stranger: oooh
Stranger: well
You: mars is hot all the time... right
Stranger: yes.. i think so
You: hot any pools by chance ?
Stranger: yeeeeeeep
You: my planet is full, its just the name of it
You: ur-anus
You: sux
Stranger: move to mercury and quickly
You: loading my space ship
You: u should come too... huge planet lots of s**t to do there
Stranger: okey i come
You: ok, maybe we can f**k with earth ppl and make them s**t their pants a lil
Stranger: haha ok !
You: cool, k man i'm gonna go now, lots of traffic on the way c ya there!
Stranger: okey bye bye !
You have disconnected.
holly shit! this one looks like mine /partially/
God, they hit it right on with omegle.
Reply