What's that you feel engulfing your nude body? That's heat in the form of sunlight. Now go back inside and put some god-damned clothes on.

According to this chart, terrorists are extremeley hot objects. DO NOT TOUCH!

Just The Facts

  1. Heat is radiation emmitted by the movement of molecules. Without movement there can be no heat and vice versa.
  2. When we say your mom is "hot" we mean she's attractive. When we say your mom is "burning to death, quick do something"...we mean she's attractive. And burning to death.
  3. When two objects meet, heat is transfered from the warmer object to the cooler object until homeostasis is reached.

Why heat is awesome! #1. It kicks cold's ass!

1. There is no heat in space, deep space, outer space or any other vacuous regions in the universe. Until two people decide to have sex there. Then their heat radiates from their bodies in sort-of the same way as sunlight. In this respect, the sun is essentially a massive orgy...of atoms and nuclear reactions and shit.

#2: Heat is too cool to wear a spacesuit!

2. To further clarify #1, when people say space-suits protect astronauts from the "cold" of space, tell those people to "fuck off" because, for one, there is no such thing as "cold." Cold is simply the absense of heat. Since there is nothing in space, there exists no "coldness" or "cold objects" to absorb the heat from your body.For two, space suits protect astronauts from gamma rays and other mutation-causing phenomena, in addition to supplying their bodies with oxygen. Ever see the film "Fantastic 4?" Wasn't it an aweful movie aside from Jessica Alba's hot ass? Well, they came into contact with Gamma Rays and received mutant powers...however, wouldn't this be an agrument AGAINST space suits?

#3: Mutant Powers...?

Gamma rays are always flying around in outer space. They carry a type of heat known as radiation which ionizes the atoms within your body. This can cause irreversible damages to your DNA. Usually this results in various forms of painful cancer. But in some cases (those that occur on TV) the changes in DNA grant the person superpowers. If Neil Armstrong hadn't worn a spacesuit and exposed himself to gamma rays, he could be able to turn himself into a human torch, which are known producers of heat. I suggest instead of going to Mars, we instead have manned missions into waves of Gamma radiation until eventually someone comes home as either "The Hulk" or "Jessica Alba with self-cloning abilities."