Breasts are those things you stare at when trying to ask a girl on a date.


Just The Facts

  1. Breasts are, in fact, big lumps of fat with milk.
  2. They have been known to contain a substance that induces mind control visually.
  3. Although they begin developing at puberty, it would be wise to wait until they're legal to stare.

The Many Facets of Titties

Breasts were originally made popular by... wait, hasn't every male in the history of the world liked boobs? Therefore, no one individual made them popular. But if he did, he would look like this.

That's right, he would look exactly like Samuel L. Jackson from Pulp Fiction.

Back on topic. Breasts are important in many cultures, though unfortunately, most of the civilized world has fucktarded rules about not showing them in public. In religion, tits are used mostly as a symbol of life, fertility, etc. I like to call them Fountains of Youth. Everyone wants to drink from them, but the only ones allowed are babies and some Spanish dude nobody ever sees again.

A few days ago, I was browsing an, ahem, art site, I stumbled across a video with the title, "HOT CHICKs WITH BIG JUGS". Being the tasteful gentleman I am, I browsed on, but kept coming (pun not intended) back to that video. No preview thumbnails. I'd have to be brave and wing it. I clicked, and was greeted to this image.

You know that's some really hot chicks.

In summary, breasts are an important part of human life, and if they did not exist we would probably spend many lonely days masturbating to the sounds of our parents having sex upstairs.