The French

Yes the French, most of us know them as those bread eating sissies from across the sea. There was a time when they were the baddest mothers in town(or Europe as it was known back then). Now let's take a look back at their good times.

Not those you silly rabbit.

I won't lie, that is a cool ass cape.

Yep they had all that blue, apparently the gray was unexplored. Maybe?

Just The Facts

  1. Napoleon Bonaparte was French, and he was pretty bad ass before that whole Russia thing.
  2. Next to the Chinese, they have the best non-American food.
  3. They invented democracy through decapitation, and we all know that is bad ass.
  4. They helped to give birth to the U.S.A. by helping the colonial forces get supplies, and I guess they helped a little as far as dealing with the British Navy.
  5. During World War II the French lost to Nazi forces in about five minutes, and gave up all the bread for survival.
  6. Prior to US involvement in Vietnam the French forces got their asses thoroughly kicked, again, by the Vietcong and some gorillas, err guerilla army.

Whats next?

So we all know the French practically ruled the world, they helped create democracy, and are also pretty gay. So what happened really? sometime between the American revolution and World War I France's strength went the way of the Sega Dreamcast. We must look ahead and be aware as the French are looking for a way to get back on top using the three natural kryptonites of humanity:

Food

Sex

Pure Sexy

And their wit.

The end is nigh, nigh indeed!