Baywatch was an incredibly successful television series about a group of lifeguards. The writers created a system for combining complex plot elements to create a stunning drama. This system can be best explained using the "Baywatch Formula"

(Optional: Hasselhoff)

Just The Facts

  1. The Guiness Book of World Records lists Baywatch as the most watched television show of all time with over 1.1 billion viewers per week.
  2. Dreamworks bought the movie rights in 2004 and plans to release a Baywatch movie in 2012 starring Jessica Simpson as Pamela Anderson's old character C.J. Parker. This is the end of the world that the Mayans actually predicted.
  3. The show was originally cancelled after one season but enjoyed great success after David Hasselhoff became the executive producer.
  4. Did we mention gratuitious use of slow motion shots of women in bathing suits with gigantic knockers?

Cracked on Baywatch

Officially, David Hasselhoff was listed as the star and executive producer of Baywatch. He went on to officially state that people watched Baywatch, "for the jokes." You know who the real stars of Baywatch (and the only reason why 1.1 billion people tuned in to watch it) were? The gigantic tits. Baywatch included countless slow motion shots of women running on the beach in bathingsuits that were incredibly illsuited to saving lives, or keeping oversized love pillows contained. So probably fewer people watched it for the jokes than they did because it wasn't as scrambled as Skinimax.

(Not Pictured: Jokes)

Speaking of free internet porn, masturbatory fodder such as Pamela Anderson, Carmen Electra, Brandy Ledford, and Gina Lee Nolin showcased their chests on screen and Anderson, Ledford, and Nolin would later appear in sex tapes (Pamela Anderson's being the only one to include a boat horn being honked by a penis). These women along with every character on the show made incredible amounts of money based soley on how good they looked in a bathing suit.

(Or how good they looked wearing only puppies and a devil may care attitude. Same thing really)