Opera
Opera, is an untouchable subject. Because of the language barrier and the very small viewing audience, knowing just a few basic plots can make you seem much more intelligent than you really are.
Just The Facts
- Opera is by definition a play in which all the words are sung.
- Most operas are not in english, but instead in italian, latin or german.
- Not all women who sing opera are fat.
- An opera is when a soprano makes love to a tenor and the baritone tries to get in the way
Opera and the badassery of Mozart
Opera: The music of intellectuaals, classically trained musicians, rich snobs and those wishing to bang the fat chick.
Opera is a great art form that became the theatre form for rich snobs to escape the plague infested peasants.[Citation needed] However, it has given birth to great stories such as Carmen and Phantom of the Opera (which is not an opera, but obviously inspired by it). This also gave way for Mozart to be the total immoral badass he was and write an opera about a Turkish Harem, Die Entführung aus dem Serail, one that's libretto was banned by Emperor Joseph II, Le nozze di Figaro (The Marriage of Figaro), and one that was written about a famous womanizer dragged straight to hell, Don Giovanni.
I like Opera, and I got my doctorate in Opera, so you got all the facts 100% correct. Bravo! (what one is legally required to say at the end of an Opera)
ReplyI am a music major working on my Masters in Voice at Indiana University, the largest opera program in the U.S. - and I was really hoping to have a good laugh at my own expense my searching the Cracked Topics for "Opera". The thing is, if you actually know a couple things about a given subject, it gives you a lot more ammo to make fun of it. I'm really getting sick of these half-assed Cracked articles by clueless people who think they can just try to write like Brockway or Seanbaby or whatever. There are so many missed opportunities in here, and this article is a half-baked joke: too short and totally weak. Look, I realize that these are supposed to be humorous, but I can also tell that you think you are writing actual facts in the "Just the facts section. Unfortunately, "Opera is by definition a play in which all the words are sung" is totally incorrect and retarded, and "Most operas are not in english, but instead in italian, latin or german" is even more retarded. Literally NO operas (in the sense that we think of them in the present day) are in Latin. Cracked is a great site, but not when they open up article spots to any random 8th grader that thinks they have something funny to say.
ReplyFunny you should say all that. I made a few mistakes and this was my first goddamn topic. As for my knowledge of opera, I'll have you know I'm sorry I was trying to get into it. Maybe I'll stop trying to get interested in a great music genre and expand my horizons. Also, I think that recitatives count as singing.
By the way I'm a freshman in college and am having difficulty managing my time, so excuse me if I don't have enough time to appease the music critics!