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Author Topic: SUBMIT A STORY  (Read 79830 times)
QuothTheRaven
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« Reply #460 on: May 02, 2006, 12:00 AM »

The PWoT news skim dies
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I asked for a '13' but they drew a '31.'
spermus
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stevesoft@mail.com stevieweavypoo stevieweavypoo
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« Reply #461 on: May 02, 2006, 02:02 AM »

Stop the presses!
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daimon67
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« Reply #462 on: July 05, 2006, 11:06 PM »

Since this is where we posted ridiculous news stories, no point in clogging the Mirth Canal with them.

Doctors debate telling fatass children that they're fat



"[Obese] sounds mean. It doesn't sound good," said Trisha Leu, 17, who thinks the proposed change is a bad idea. The Wheeling, Illinois, teen has lost 60 pounds since March as part of an adolescent obesity surgery study at the University of Illinois at Chicago.

"When you're young, you don't understand what obese means," Leu said. "I still don't understand it."
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negative score
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hooray beer!


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« Reply #463 on: July 20, 2006, 03:16 PM »

An older story, but still good

Rogue Tractor Thieves Free Prison Inmates

Either that was one huge tractor or the prison walls were made of paper mache. I vote the latter.
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Gonz
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« Reply #464 on: July 26, 2006, 07:44 AM »

Killer kangaroos and the 'demon duck of doom'
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daimon67
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« Reply #465 on: July 26, 2006, 10:48 PM »

In shocking announcement, Lance Bass shockingly reveals that he is gay; shock ensues
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birdy
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The Homeless: Misplaced loved ones or a secret society that protects the earth?


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« Reply #466 on: August 08, 2006, 01:33 PM »

Grandmother threatened with fine for not watering her lawn
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Green means hold on, yellow means go, and red means where the fuck did you get that banana at.
daimon67
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« Reply #467 on: September 19, 2006, 02:18 PM »

Corpse of "Masterpiece Theatre" host Alistair Cooke sold piece by piece
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Gonz
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« Reply #468 on: December 03, 2006, 09:48 AM »

Blind man sentenced to library time.

What can I say?  I'm nostalgic for the News Skim.
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daimon67
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« Reply #469 on: January 25, 2007, 02:40 PM »

Q: What's the only thing worse than a man in his forties and a man in his sixties adopting a 12-year old boy for sexual exploitation?

A: Realizing the kid is actually a 29-year old that loves sex with older men.
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demonic-flame
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Freaks are normal people too, you know!!


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« Reply #470 on: March 03, 2007, 04:56 PM »

Some people just can't take the fact that God doesn't give out paychecks:
http://www.wtopnews.com/?nid=456&sid=1074899

I'd have pissed over the supervisor, myself:
http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=39555&in_page_id=2

Oh, here's a bunch of true stories that happened to criminals:
1 Some teenage theives were trying to force open a door, when it opened. They realised one of them had rang the doorbell.
2 A line of suspects were told to hold a fake gun and say "Your money or your life", when one of them shouted "That wasn't what I said!!"
3 A suspect was wired into a 'lie detector'. The officer asked his name. No bleep. The O asked if he was guilty. "No." Bleep. The O asked if he had anything to do with it. "No." Bleep. Eventually, he confessed because of the 'lie detector'.
4 A group came for an armed robbery. They came and put on their balaclava things. They had forgotten to cut eye-holes.
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When two-inch spikes come into fashion, I'll laugh at you.

Of course, I can only do that if you religious people are right, in which case I'll have to climb out of hell and shout it up to you.
Otis Driftwood
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« Reply #471 on: March 24, 2007, 12:04 PM »

Sixth Graders become scientific authority. Will rival top scientists soon.
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Otis Driftwood
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« Reply #472 on: March 24, 2007, 12:13 PM »

Couple leaves modern life, but not Manhattan.

"Modern" life to include tampons.
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rabbidmonkey4
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« Reply #473 on: March 27, 2007, 09:49 AM »

I got this from eitmonline.com
Parents say fertility clinic botched in-vitro & girl's got the wrong dad



I know this isn't funny, but I can't stop laughing.
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Otis Driftwood
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« Reply #474 on: March 31, 2007, 10:52 PM »

Travolta solves Global Warming.
Vows to move off planet.


God I miss News Skim.
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Gonz
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« Reply #475 on: April 07, 2007, 07:13 PM »

Me too.

Bowel Movement Saves 100
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good shepherd
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« Reply #476 on: April 09, 2007, 06:24 PM »

penn and teller were caught having gay sex
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Gonz
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« Reply #477 on: April 11, 2007, 04:03 PM »

I'm not entirely convinced you've understood the procedure here.
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lord_harris
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What about the gay gene, that causes gayness?

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« Reply #478 on: April 11, 2007, 04:27 PM »

That's what Teller said.
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Quote
A Conservative spokesman said: "We're not really sure what Daniel Hannan's problem is with the NHS. Perhaps they were unable to save his hair."
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« Reply #479 on: April 23, 2007, 06:04 AM »

www.theage.com.au/news/national/second-empty-vessel-found-off-coast/2007/04/23/1177180560152.html

I'm starting to think that theres a boogie man off Australia's coast.
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