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cyrano
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« on: September 01, 2008, 05:22 AM »
Staged? Moi?

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Russians are lauding Prime Minister Vladimir Putin after he reportedly saved scientists and a film crew from a huge escaped tiger in the Russian Far East. The tiger was no match for the judo champion and former KGB agent with a tranquilizer rifle.


Whether that tiger had help during its escape or not, it'd take a lot of brush clearing to get near that level of raw manliness.
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The Edge Will Cut You
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« Reply #1 on: September 01, 2008, 05:27 AM »

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After sedating the beast, Putin went on to assist the scientists as they measured the tiger's enormous canine fangs and fitted a satellite transmitter around its neck.

I was so sure that was going to say "they measured the tiger's enormous wang and confirmed that it was indeed several inches shorter than Putin's".
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« Reply #2 on: September 01, 2008, 05:29 AM »
How annoying... This is just Russia trying to start up another Cold War.

Now Obama is going to have to wrestle a bear.
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Willatron
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« Reply #3 on: September 01, 2008, 10:47 AM »
Putin is setting standards for manly national leaders like never before.

Seriously, Stephen Harper is such a pussy compared to this guy.
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« Reply #4 on: September 01, 2008, 10:51 AM »
So what was the point of mentioning the fact that Putin is a judo champion? He didn't wrestle the tiger, he just shot it.

Or did they incorporate gun-kata into judo now?
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« Reply #5 on: September 01, 2008, 02:51 PM »
Quote from: Willatron on September 01, 2008, 10:47 AM
Putin is setting standards for manly national leaders like never before.

Seriously, Stephen Harper is such a pussy compared to this guy.

Fuck that, Putin has nothing on Teddy Roosevelt.
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« Reply #6 on: September 01, 2008, 04:44 PM »
Quote from: Phonz on September 01, 2008, 10:51 AM
So what was the point of mentioning the fact that Putin is a judo champion? He didn't wrestle the tiger, he just shot it.

Or did they incorporate gun-kata into judo now?

Everyone knows that judo is the most effective martial art when facing a tiger. This is as opposed to tai kwon do against lions, wushu against grizzly bears, and gymkata against angry villagers.
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« Reply #7 on: September 01, 2008, 05:04 PM »
I'm telling you guys, the Reds are fucking back.

They tried the whole peace and cooperation thing, and you know what? It didn't work out. They didn't like it.

Now Putin is squaring off against angry tigers. This shit just got real.
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« Reply #8 on: September 01, 2008, 07:46 PM »
I was unaware that Judo is useful when firing a gun.
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« Reply #9 on: September 01, 2008, 10:47 PM »
Putin ain't need no judo to bust a tiger down on into its component pieces.



They just put that factoid into the article to let you know that he could kick your ass, gun or no gun.
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« Reply #10 on: September 02, 2008, 04:05 AM »
The icing on the absurdity awesomeness cake is when you hit the beefcake shots of Putin fishing shirtless in army boots.  I mean, those 3 things don't even make sense together...it's like manliness madlibs.

Vladimir Putin went fishing without his shirt while dressed as a soldier then used his gun and Judo to fight a tiger.
« Last Edit: September 02, 2008, 01:12 PM by Wibblewobble » Logged
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