Ayveq the Masturbating Walrus Has Died
by David Wong
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July 1st, 2008 at 12:51 pm
I remember the first time I saw Ayveq, and they are correct about his ritualistic self-pleasuring ways being compelling. If you replace “compelling” with obscene, horrific, and douchebag-like. It wasn’t some innocent discovery of sexual gratification or anything like that… he would wait until you came up to the glass, and then proceed to press his genitalia against said glass and basically perform the Degeneration-X “suck it” maneuver with his fins. Especially when children were around. I saw on numerous occasions as he would be floating and would wait SPECIFICALLY for a small child or a group of small children to come up to the glass before he would engage the rage and furiously waggle his genitals at them.
July 1st, 2008 at 6:20 pm
NOOOOO!!!!!