chemtard
Tom Cruise (yellow) and John Travolta (Red) attempt to explain the principles of Scientology.
GeeGee
Bob hated donating his change to these two. He was pretty sure they'd blow it on something stupid.
pontificus
It seems a bit redundant to have the words "Caution" and "Danger" written on outfits like that...
jwhaler
"Hi, I'm Harold Lederman. I'm an attorney. Here's my card. When the police come and beat the living shit out of you later today, call me."
Bosephus5000
And with one accidental bump, the feud between the Mafia and Cirque du Soleil was on.
zbeebs
Most people have a tiny angel and tiny devil over each shoulder. Steve has these two.
SlothLoveChunk
"I'm not asking you to go home and put your 'Police Scene' outfit on Paul. . . I'm TELLING you."
kareokie
Jim cursed craigslist at first but then realized; at his age a threesome is a threesome
MrBogus
Supervillians "Caution" and "Danger" confront their arch nemesis, "Safety Inspector Man".
Brett-Butler
Having turned 60, Elton John and his partner decided it was time to dress more conservatively
DaveMalyk
Tim Burton's remake of The Cat and the Hat will contain a much darker version of Thing 1 and Thing 2
Drroxxette
Sesame Street became a scarrier place when TIm Burton started designing the muppets...
muddyalcapones
Project Runway began to run out of challenge ideas sometime around season 6
getittwistd
Evolution turned out to be a little less cool than most people had originally thought.
HelperMonkey
I'd plead self-defense, because "They came out of nowhere" won't fly with the D.A.
zbeebs
"Thank you, Caution Lady and Danger Man! If it hadn't been for you, I might have ruined my shoes in that wet cement!"
Leaf
Despite the devil like appearance of the one in red, it's apparently the one in yellow that you should be cautious of!
Holy the Goalie
Mr. Donnelly asks for directions to the subway in New York's "Fetish District."
boredwork
Frank about shit himself when his private life became public at the worst time possible.
scottz6
"You two couldn't have come at a worse time" "That's what your mother said last night"
dubiousmx
When selling your soul to the devil, make sure you choose the best fiend for your particular needs. Here at Fiend, Fiend and Smith, we do souls right.
boredwork
The tape fetishists finally gave up on craigslist and starting going public with their requests for 'a submissive third.'
somfas
I don't care how strangely they may be dressed when two salesmen have you by the nipple and ball-sack..... you listen to their pitch!
gm_zero
In a world ruled by danger and cautiousness... James Franco: "God, why is everyone so dangerous and cautious?!" One FBI agent will rise.. Al Pacino: "Get the fuck outta my CITY!" Coming September...
Leaf
Bill desperately tried to remember the directions his friend had given him... "Go down three blocks, past the train crossing, then past the tranny crossing..."
Leaf
Bill blatantly looked down at the red man's crotch to see what he was packing.... Bill liked to live Dangerously...
megaweege66
For the last time.....I don't have any change and no I don't want a blow job!!!
fushheads
The invading aliens began to wonder why all the earthlings kept their distance...
HelperMonkey
We're here to give you a message from the future...Where are you going? Come back!!!
AlphaKenny1
The decision to stage Burning Man in a sprawling urban metropolis was not embraced immediately.
dumanyo
"Have you seen our son...he's hard to miss, green with black stripes....That's sort of out thing."
Ninjamuffin
It is at this unfortunate moment that the senator makes a joke about safe sex that, while rather funny, ignites the Plastic Republic's war against the USA.
djseifer
"Has anyone seen our balloons? They're big, red, looks like a giant wang... we may have left them over by a sycamore tree."
Bell110
They tried their best to warn people outside of Wall Street of the impending financial collapse.
boredwork
Ummmmm, the caution tapes definitely doing it for me but the danger tape is kind of a turn off.
rooster_26
Jehovah Witnesses have started using new tactics in delivering the good news.
jwhaler
"...So folks, whatd'ya think of that cherry '91 Hyundai, huh? She's a real steal and I'm giving you the same price I'd give my own mother..."
Bell110
The United States Government finally made prostitution legal, as long as they wear their warning labels.
Ubergeek
Me? I'd do PLENTY of things for a Klondike Bar - but I won't dress up like you two dipshits.
Kierkegaard
Although he'd been in therapy for years, this was not the way Randall Abernathy expected to confront his anger and fear.
emanresU
Hey you two...yeah, you two in the caution tape...don't you think that guy in the green hat is pushing it. I mean, green? Its a bit loud for September, thats all I'm saying.
CreepyOldMan
"If I kick the shit out of either one of you, the cops would just congratulate me."
franktownfrank
Guy is thinking: "I just knew this kind of shit would happen when we moved to San Francisco. We should have stayed in New York, where at least the homeless have some shred of dignity."
montanaguy
Hi I'm terrorist alert level yellow, and this is my friend red.......would you like to play a game with us. Just lay face down and give up your rights.......c'mon it'll be fun!
nosayso
If Steve had known the Higgs boson would look like this, he never would have turned on the Large Hadron Collider.
Leaf
Superheroes for the working man: Caution and Danger let Bob know that his fly is down before his big interview...
fatcat
"Mom. . Dad. . We need to talk about the way you've been acting since the 60s. ."
CavalierX
I'm voting for the red-and-black party; I just can't stand the yellow-and-black party's policies.
Holy the Goalie
Festen and Glade looked around uneasily; the transporter had clearly malfunctioned. They weren't on Pluto anymore.
Bosephus5000
The first draft of Megan's Law was a little more restrictive than what was finally passed.
iamasuperhero
The Don listened carefully, but simply wasn't convinced by their attempts to become undercover agents.
abernathy
Hey guys, I told you not to meet me in public. I can't be seen with you. Although, I am tempted to change into "Mr. Green."
boredwork
Sensing an immanent pants-shitting, a group of passing pedestrians began to gather behind Frank, fulfilling their civic duty to make the worst situation unbearably embarrassing.
CavalierX
Due to the stuttering economy, the city will be calling out more... economical superheroes to defend us from evil.
Leaf
Even with the appearance of Caution and Danger, none of the pedestrians clued in that they were walking in the MIDDLE OF THE FREAKIN' ROAD!!!
getittwistd
"Uh, has anyone seen the Power Rangers? We were supposed to battle at 3:30, but they never showed up. Oh well..."
gm_zero
The fateful moment when god decided that four horsemen were adequate and these two would have to find another apocolypse.
gm_zero
"Ok, I need you to lay in front of the construction site and you.. Oh, I have an awfully interesting job for you..."
Hamper
"Hi. I'm from The First Bank of New York and I'd like a few moments of your time to talk to you two about dignity and what it can do for you.
oleo
The Fashion Police catch their #2 Most Wanted: Man With Pink Suit Shirt; but the wily 'Man Who Wears Socks With Sandals' remains on the loose.
theschweitz
Danger Man and Caution Lass were doing great, right until they were thwarted by Insurance Man!
Anonimoose
McCain and Palin are really trying to show voters that they care about recycling.
fallenchipmunk
Jerry was faced with the horrible decision of choosing which one would live....and which one would die.
Cap
Steve was angry. He had forgotten the words - Klaatu, Barada Nikto - and this was the end result.
craptions
In a move to clean up the streets, the city passes an ordinance that forces hobos to dress like french clowns in hopes of making the downtown area come alive with fun and laughter. FAIL
agalryunaer
It seems our invisibility device doesnt work with distances shorter than 5 feet. Dammit!
getittwistd
...and this is my wife, my daughter, and I on vacation in New Jersey! I know, who goes to New Jersey for a vacation?! We were only there for an afternoon, because we'd never been there before...
Cap
Cracked editors Jack O'Brien and Dan O'Brien draw attention to themselves in order to get that perfect shot for their Craptions feature. Photo credit: David Wong
MrTowel
Bob stopped and sighed. He realized going back in time and saving Lincoln probably wasn't a good idea, after all.
Wazula
Man in suit: Hi. I'm Dan. Um. I'm a registered sex offender. Yeah. Hope you're okay with that. Man in Red:....get away from me....
MONGO1971
And the witch said that all we need to switch back is your balls, and sweat from mom's taint. So, what do ya think?
pjlovesauce
You don't remember me from that Halloween party in college? I wore this outfit. Well, meet your son.
TTizzle
We represent the Munchkin Safety Guild, and we welcome you to Munchkinland, remember to use caution!
Fkelleghan
Jim mused, irrelevantly, that the one good thing about masturbation is, when it’s over, you’re not left standing there like an idiot, wondering what the fuck just happened. Unlike now.
gablibors
*POOF* "We are the angels of dea--- God dammit Bill! I thought you said you bought the plain black ones??"
thecrazyb133
Excuse me, but hast thou directions to the court of King Arthur and Camelot?
velocirapture
"Excuse me sir, we're looking for our friend. Perhaps you've seen him? About 5'9", dressed like a hotdog..."
mgbinsd
Hi I'm mustard, and this is my friend ketchup...and we're here to talk to you about safe sex. Always use a condiment.
Rex-Jester
Proof positive that the Cracked.com team is using a transporter to parallel dimensions to take these weird-as-shit pictures.
gatorboymike
The actors hired to play Satan's offspring in The Devil's Advocate 2 didn't really work out.
CavalierX
I've heard of the bulls and the bears, but these days it's obvious that on Wall Street, the clowns are running.
Spirolli
"The Tape Heroes are here. The Caution Woman and Danger Man. We have Toxic Materials tape man held up in the building."
Truthiness
And this is why people who hang out at raves on weekends dont make good fashion designers.
HelperMonkey
Stripes might provide a slimming look, but use in moderation, for Christ's sake!
Rex-Jester
Failing to heed otherwise sublime warnings, Phil decided to give the two strangers a ride to the Circle K.
getittwistd
You gotta ask yourself one question, "Do I feel lucky?" well, do yHAHAHAHAHAH...ok, I can't do this, I mean frickin' seriously!
DaveMalyk
Tim Burton's remake of The Cat and the Hat will contain a much darker version of Thing 1 and Thing 2 ... obviously played here by Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter
djseifer
"Yes, I can see you're dressed for the occasion, but I'm afraid I can't let you enter Mardi Gras without a black tie."
donspaghetti
The man in white and the man in red kept looking at each other for a very long time. They could not take their eyes of each other for they knew what this was, this was love!
cconger
Jaywalking in New york is rigorously monitored by the Jester Smurfs, proving to be effective and fashionable force to be reckoned with.
Leaf
..and the ghost of Christmas yet to come raised his cloak and said "The boy is Danger, the girl is Caution. Beware them both, but especially the boy..."
jaquil
Mr. Feinberg was nervous when he encountered the two thugs from Greenwich Village, but then again he also had been taking karate lessons for 3 weeks.
d73
Damnit Bob, quit with that awkward dont know which way to go dance. Believe it or not, we always go straight.
tomroadrunner
What??? You told me you would be a couple of farting Brazilian lesbians!!! DAMN YOU CRAIGSLIST!!!!!!
getittwistd
After winning the duck tape challenge last year, John and Lena decided to try something a little different in 2008.
CavalierX
I just KNEW the clowns would eventually come looking for the giant balloons from yesterday's Craption...
kellybrisbin
"But I thought you said we were dressing up on Thursday! Damn! Now I feel out of place."
getittwistd
"Oh, you meant dress up! I guess we look a little foolish now, don't we Marge!"
walloftext
When it comes to animal rights protests, PETA really knows how to cut through the red tape to get their message across. Yellow tape too, evidently.
schnook
The Men in Black, having modernized their wardrobe, were powerless to stop them.
Brittony
"Tell her how ridiculous she looks with that yellow ribbon around her waist, I mean, Jesus!" "Shove it, John, at least my ears aren't all curved and shit."
pelcurus
One of the darkest moments in candy history was when Willy Wonka put his company on the stock market. The Oompa Loompas evolved into a new form in order to adapt to their new environment on Wall Street. It was a horrifying experience nobody saw com
richardspeck
Blinky and Clyde track down a federally relocated Pacman and exact their vengeance.
getittwistd
Cosplay is becoming more popular day by day. Above, we have 2 people dressed up as characters from Spore, which is a videogame about how to screw your customers up the butthole while charging them US $49.95.
Leaf
The scene outside the new Cirque du Soleil show... Caution! Danger! French clowns ahead!
LordBungle
"Resevoir Dogs TAKE ONE" No this isn't working we need something a little less literal
mexgeo86
So Yellow and Red are taken? Where do I get a Green suit so we can do the Traffic Light game?
Enabsflow
Pickachu and Magmar team up to warn the public that of imminant danger. Despite their colorful efforts, no one takes them seriously.
superpoop
Richard Gere accidentally took three hits of the acid, and realized that Tom and Katy really were aliens.
iantendo
"You Know kids, I used to be just like you... then I stopped dicking around and got a job you fuckin' freaks!"
Bosephus5000
On the opening night of Hannah Montana's one woman, Broadway musical, God sends two angels to New York to caution mankind of the impending danger.
megaweege66
...alright the first one of you Nancy boys that get any closer is gettin shanked in the eye.
Ubergeek
Fruit Stripe's "Takin' It to The Streets" ad campaign met with limited success.
_Phoenix_
This is the danger of telling cautionary tales to random people on the street.
agalryunaer
Hi, we are pleased to invite you to the new all-you-can-eat condiment restaurant
Cap
Hey guys! Check out the idiot in the neon green ballcap behind me! That color is SOOO last year!
Stardog
Listen guys about the costume party, they changed it to a suit n tie party... sorry u didn't get the memo...
Stardog
Well the one on the left is a pikachu, the one on the right idk, the one in the middle, is a Richard Nixon
franktownfrank
Joe Pesci not at all impressed with the new Home Alone movie, Home Alone 5: Acid Trip in NYC, and prepares to call his agent.
Cap
The NYPD's newest mascots were big hits in the Theater District but they just pissed off everybody on Wall Street.
craptions
Ron Paul warned us about this...now look at the clowns running for office...at least there are warning signs...
EddieBrock412
based on the look on the face of the guy in the business suit, the red suited guy's peis is showing.
TulsaZ79
Meanwhile at the Annual Street Performer & Ambulance Chasing Lawyer Convention...
blackadderz
Jim backed away slowly. He had just been mugged by two clowns in caution tape. How could he ever tell his wife that was how he lost his credit cards?
frees33
If a guy is dressed up in a yellow or red and black pin stripe bag...he'll probably suck your dick
JPN366
"We represent the 'Anal Is Evil' chastity club. Would you like a promise cock ring?"
Secret Agent
You shoulda been here last Halloween when they used just traffic cones, now that was awkward.
CreatureFeature
"Why is everyone gawking at us? Didn't the witnesses tell them Jesus is returning with nukes?"
CreatureFeature
"Hey, honey, look at that man's ridiculous powder-blue suit!" "What a freak!"
Rex-Jester
Rick gasped when he realized his ex was the one in yellow with "Rhett" Barone.
hiro4696
You HAVE to believe us! King of the Mighty Caution and the King of Extreme Danger is going to wage a war on earth!
Arnor
DANGERMAN and his trusty sidekick CAUTIONBOY face their arch nemesis THE ATTOURNEY!!!!!!
Quick127
Pikachu, Satan, and Vinny stood in shock at the audacity of the man in the neon green hat.
russoni
Moments before Asian Pope come out of nowhere and killed the Devil. They do not question their fate... For this is the way of the samurai.
godzillarodeo85
Yellow: "Lick me! I taste like BANANA!" Red: "No! Lick me! I taste like STRAWBERRIES!"
Dannerman
"Crap, I've read this script... You want me to put on a green suit like yours and fight crime with you, don't you? I hate my life."
Dannerman
"Crap... I've read this script. I have to go put on a green suit and fight crime with you, don't I?"
laterali
Yellow: "...serious, it's THIS big!" Man in suit: "Sold! Wait 'til you see MY costume."
Clqwrx
Despite his best efforts, Jim could not divert attention away from his chronic erection.
DesertEagle
The Ketchup and Mustard Convention just didn't have the same excitement level as Comi-Con.
peachykeenchica
The Lehman Bros take the streets to educate Americans on the tanking economy.
hey_mavis
Listen man, I don't have a problem with u wearing those hideous garments....but dude...what's with the tie? And those shades are just god awful!
Fkelleghan
Number 8 on the list of "Ineffectual Ways to Conduct Tryouts for Superheroes' Sidekicks."
NobodyNowhere
"Oh great. I TOLD Richard to wear the green striped outfit we made him. Now we all look stupid."
Sarcasticguy
The gay version of Venom didn't catch up to the Spiderman's movie fan club expectations...
mikelaz14
Youve just won a free prize.... Now tell us sir would you like a hummer in red or a hummer in yellow
mikelaz14
sorry guys yo just missed halloween and the macys day parade isnt for a couple months now
20characters1
An unbeatable crime fighting duo was created today Greg "Danger" Smith and Carmen "Caution" Jones together they will be THE FIGHT STRIPES
RNbulletsponge
Sadly, the Transformers turned out to be a roll of police tape and a red biohazard bag.
EinDose
Japanese mostly export technology, Godzilla, and Power Ranger-esque shows. I think this is one of them, that guy in the suit's kinda reptillian.
booleanspline
You know Track and Willow, but meet Sarah Palin's other two kids, caution and danger.
toughnut
The Bloods beat the Piss out of the Crips. . Hence the yellow outfit. . It's pee. . Nevermind.
uzielis
My name is Bobby Bozzini. I work as councilman for Rufus the Red, the man your friend, the Blue Meanie, stole from. You're both under arrest. You have the right to remain silent, but if you do, we'll make you talk. Now move.
ScottMon
They were bold and daring, but for some reason, Lily and Talia never quite got the response they were hoping for.
Frostilicus
Hi! I'm Pikachu! Pika Pika! Him? Oh.. that's.. that's Satan. We uh, we don't talk to him.
Hero
This is the last known picture of Paul. Spectators say, right after this picture was taken, he began to run down the street yelling "Caution!! Danger!!" for at least 6 miles.
MDowns9
When Richard Gere signed up to do Pretty Woman 2, no one handed him a scritp or told him Julia Roberts wasn't going to be in it. But he thought "What the hell I need the money."
scabbalicious
Everyone was shocked to see Tammy and Ron make a major fashion faux-pas...wearing vertical AND horizontal stripes.
eudoxus
Little did the onlookers know, but the guy on the right is actually a complete prick.
darkangelgag
Yellow: I'm supporting the save bumble bees campaign Red: I'm prompting that despite being yellow all bumble bees are the devils spawn
Hi... I'm looking for my daughter, have you seen her? Her name is "Police Line Do Not Cross"
hey_mavis
Who said being homeless broke and drug addicted means you can't be fashionable?
Drknowledge
What happened to craptions. Did some short/balding insecure guy take it over? It used to be funny.
nycjester
Hi...we're a little lost...do you know where the auditions for "Tim Burton Presents: The Lion King" are?
TheCrackFox11
"So, by the power vested in me by the State of New York, I now pronounce you red stripy freak and yellow stripy freak. You may kiss the stripy freak".
steeltesseract
It seems more of Wonka's unfinished treats had made their way to the streets with far mor disturbing side effects
doug5633
Bill was concerned, He had accidentally but on 1 blue sock and 1 black sock this morning.
IMBAK619
protestors outside of AIG head quarters. They don't seem like whacked out loonys now do they?? They got the last laugh
snotsnake
"No we're real, Dave...just like we told you last night in your dream. Stop pinching yourself..."
carpe-noctem12
Ted knew that the tourists thought he wasn't real. He was just waiting....waiting to POUNCE. Until then, his dolls keep him company.
deathmate
After the Jurassic Parc fad passed, Rex had to find another line of work. At least now he has dental insurance.
nosayso
Terry may have been a hero to the dinosaurs, but he was a giant asshole to the mammals. After the comet hit, they did this to Terry's statue.
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