Other Craptions

Alternative energy has finally resulted in cars that run on helium... now it's just a bitch to keep them on the ground...

STAY!

As I gazed out over the playground I only counted 19. Only 19 kids to fight! Luck was on my side. Today's battle would be just a little easier. Little did I know that number 20 was sabotaging my only escape route!

It was at that time young Timmy realized his gawking had only angered the giant tentacle monster, and if life was anything like those strange cartoons daddy watched Japan was not going to be as fun as he'd thought.

Timmy told his parents he wasn't leaving the store without a new toy. Your move now muthafuckers!

Right There! Right Fucking There! That sonofabitch smiled at me again!

Transformer Bondage is one thing, but in public?!

Now I'll have to find another child to lock in my trunk.

Back then, when the cops gave a ticket, THEY GAVE A FUCKING TICKET.

"AND STOP CALLING ME TIMMY!"

"Try to escape from that, smart car!"

Son, point to where the car touched you.

Sick of his car being stolen, Timmy had finally found a solution; though in retrospect, he saw a serious flaw in his plan.

The car had angered Damian. Now, like his mother, his little sister, and that motherfucker that cut him in the lunch line, it would experience the power of the antichrist.

white man always be puttin the black cars down

Oh My God look how tiny his hands are and how ginormous his head is!

Little Jonny learned how to tie a knot the other day. When he showed off, Mom was proud, Dad was less thrilled.

"The sign says 'Parking for Pokemon Fans ONLY'... You'll move next time, won't you, bitch?"

Mutant Teenage Ninja Earthworms...

craptions need to have time stamps

I told you to stop talkin' shit, KITT.

HEY, THAT FUCKING KID DID THAT TO MY CAR TOO!!! YOU LITTLE BASTARD!!!!!!!

Quick Robin...to the Bondage Mobile!!!

Try and transform now Megatron!

"Hey kid, it's rude to point and the orphanage is getting pretty full..."

In Detroit you buy American or else.

Timmy had a real eye for the obvious

The European version of the boot.

That'll teach you to park in a handicap spot you wanker!

Pokemon Master Trainer Bobby: "Pieceofcrapazoid, I choose you!"

"Was that really necessary, daddy?" "Are you questioning your father? Looks like someone else is in need of a good bondage."

If MADD could have its way...

Having immobilized Bumblebee, Timmy then proceeds to tickle him to death

I've had enough, Murphy! You're a loose cannon! GIMME YER BADDDGE!

The rope parasite slowly breaks it way out of its car cocoon, it will soon need to feed on young boys and lint. It will then find another car to infect to lay its eggs. It may seem cruel to us, but such is their way of life.

"This car sure is a fighter, I think we'll need more rope, dad!"

Timmy immediately noticed what was missing in the vehicle history report.

"...wasn't me, the black one did it."

After more than two decades, it seemed that the folks at "Where's Waldo" were just phoning it in...

Where are the booby cakes you stole from me? I WANT THEM BACK!!!!!!!!

That's what you get for not being fuel efficient.

When they boot a car over there they don't fuck around!

After many years of watching and waiting, the earth decided it was time to attack. Timmy was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

"Throw out the anchor!" "Aye, aye, captain! That car ain't going anywhere."

"Are you my daddy?"

Missed a spot!!

Daddy, is that were speed holes come from?

Seeing the poor broken down car that no one cared about, Ralphie recognized a kindred spirit. "That one." Ralphie choked back tears. "I want to bring that one home!"

rules for craptions? what's next... underwear?!?