Other Craptions

Look at me earthlings and prepare to.. I said look at me.. Do you speak English?

"...and so then I said to him 'Oh yeah, well you may be 18 feet tall, but the lack of bulge in your spandex tells me all I need to'...what, why are you looking at me like that?...shit, he's standing right behind me isn't he?"

After years of being the butt of every ones jokes, it turns out the scientologists where right.

In memory of the "teenagers with attitude", The Power rangers will never be forgotten.

Fans lined up for INCHES waiting for the new Ultraman movie.

Alice every time we come to this chinese buffet the food looks like it old and been sitting out for a while!

Other superheros are tasked with fighting monsters and stoping criminal masterminds. John's job was to protect these hobos from mild harassment.

"You removed him from his original package?! Great, now it isn't worth shit!"

The Day the Earth Stood Indifferent

His NBA career over, Yao Min was forced to work as a Security Guard at China's Liesure World.

Have you seen my wife? She's about 20'5", metallic skin...she's got the dull afterglow of intergalactic genocide in her eyes.

The day the Gayliens landed...

In Japan, Death took on a very different form.

Pink spandex make look gay huh? Well..uh..uh your mama so fat, no wait...uh..fuck you old man.

" So I hear you can buy his used underwear in that vending machine over there"

"Well? It ain't gonna suck itself."

Only one in every four men will be considered "ultra".

Power Ranger Memorial Day turned out to be a big failure.

I don't care if you're from L.A., New York, or the galaxy Zendilphine - spandex shorts do NOT LOOK GOOD!!!

IGNORE ME!

This looks like a job for...CAPTAIN ANDROGYNY!!!

Zorran thought his suit of invisability had fooled them all. In reality, they just didn't give a fuck.

"Stupid Science Fair and its 'Must be in high school' rule. We would've won, too."

...Meanwhile, outside the Hall of Scientology...

"Now don't get scared, Bob, but there's a pretty big insect on your back."

Yeah, yeah. We'll surrender to our new overlords in a minute. Just let us finish this game.

Zohran came 2,000 light years to be first in line for the iPhone.

Dads waiting on their kids at the Comic-Con...and thinking about the grandchildren that will never be fathered.

"The international church of the Power Ranger"

What?! No, I will NOT "rub your corns" for a quarter! I said I'm here to take over your... What?! No, I DO NOT know what time the bus comes by! I said I'm... Just forget it... God Dammit.

When your greatest superpower is 'provides shade' you lose the right to wear a costume.

"Does anybody else smell crotch?"

Have you guys seen my friends? I heard they were auditioning for a movie. What? Yesterday? DAMN.

I just don't get Asian porn anymore...

So I totally kicked Ultraman's ass...no seriously. What? He's standing right behind me? Um, er...

The two elderly men were in no way prepared for George Takei's greatest invention.

The alien realized that his navigation system let him down, considering the fact that he entered 'Control center of Planet Earth' as his destination.

After the epic battle and subsequent destruction of the All-Spark and Megatron, the Autobots found themselves with a lot of time on their hands.

Ultraman and men wearing Ultra diapers.

Two of these men would have calm quite days, the other would experience a tea bagging of inter-galactic proportions.

Tired of being ignored, Giant-Robo-Bug-Man seriously considered pissing on the bald guy's head to get some attention.

Is that LR Hubbard in the Xenu suit? It was him all along!!!

Little did they know, their gay superhero landlord was going to collect the rent in a big and romantic way.

"Those Americans will have sex with anything", said the man in the hat.

"I...AM......FIBERGLASS-RESIN MAN

After 2 straight days of fights breaking out over line cutting at the early bird special, the Country Kitchen Buffet decided to address the situation with the toughest bouncer they could afford

Asian...barrier...too...strong...can't...save...Japan...

Humanity's first renaissance had works like Michelangelo's David... Its second had this guy.

So how much longer is it going to take to charge the damn battery? The world isn't going to conqure itself you know.