Other Craptions

It's a good thing the guy on the left doesn't realize he's giving it a handjob. Otherwise he'd stop, and then they'd all be dead.

It's 5 p.m. Do you know where your child is?

They thought they were in trouble when they hit that huge snake. Fortunately, they came across a ladder just up the road.

NO MOTHERFUCKIN' SNAKES IN MY MOTHERFUCKIN' LANE!

Ah the old Guatemalan "leave a massive fake snake and drive off with the trucks while your friends take a picture" prank. Classic every time.

And here's a photo of our 12-man group with a huge..uh..er..hmmm. And here's a photo with our 11-man group with.....

Hey, does anyone have a huge can of peanut brittle? I've got the best idea ever!

"And this is only when it's FLACCID"

Fellas, get your gold chains and cheap cologne! Tonight we all go out with brand new boots!

it wasn't until years later that the men realized that their hunting buddy, dirk, wasn't a naked, castrated quadruple amputee bald mute. he was actually a big motherfuckin' snake.

Umm...guys? It's got my hand. Guys? Hello, is anyone listening to me? GUYS?!?

Once you get to be an expert at holding your snake, you are awarded a sexy beige shirt.

It's kind of embarassing when you think about it... 11 guys and hundreds of yards of rope, but it only takes an underwear-clad Signourney Weaver to kill an acid-spewing space monster all by herself.

Ok. One of us has to be bait. Steve, no. Frank, no. Me, no. Oh! Paco go over there and act like a wounded rabbit.

Steve Irwin's final resting place.

World's largest Banana Slug

"No, no! If you want to get your dog out, you don't shake it. You have to roll it from the end, like a toothpaste tube!"

In an alternate, happier reality, the trap that was the movie Anaconda works with the swallowing and slow digestion of JLo.

Hi! My name is Mike Rowe, and this is my job.

These men look way to excited to be holding a snake.

Ok, $20 to the first person who can guess who the job supervisor is...

Click here if you think Lardlad is a Homo. ---------->

Insert Penis Joke Here. Insert Joke About Inserting Penis Here.

Due to a translation error, the South American version of Monty Python varied quite alot from the original. However, it was equally hilarious.

PETA lost a few members the day it decided to free Big Earl from captivity.

"Give me an M!"

Oh, for god's sake. BoostingPosts/ thecrunch/ whoever thinks I'm cheating, so they have been blatantly cheating every night to "stop" me? Does no one see the irony here? Also, that snake looks like he's been eating Mexican.

"OH MAN...we are gonna have the SWEETEST boots this side of the heavily guarded yet totally penetrable boarder."

LardLad's captions are funny. Kwitcherbitchin.

The Santos family proudly displays Grandpa's recently removed tapeworm.

Too poor to afford asphalt, the country of Paraguay has to relay on alternative speed bump materials

In Africa when a Boa eats you, that's it, your sorry ass ain't even getting a coffin. Pictured above: funeral procession of Matumbo Kalwele

Though it was a little dusty, Wyatt Earp's moustache appeared to be in great condition.

"Guys, not to be a dick, but I seriously doubt your Snakes on a Plane musical is going to make it to Broadway."

Look what else we found in Richard Gere's ass!

Everyone looked happy in the picture...but they all agreed that it did NOT taste like chicken.

While Julio was the reason they found the snake, the other guys wouldn't let him in the picture because he acted like such a bitch about it.

"I once caught a snake that was THIS big!" "Stop exaggerating."

The prop masters on the new movie, "Indiana Jones and his Excrutiating Death"

The snake was caught, but he got the last laugh. Just before being captured, he released the parking brake on the white car.

Heh...wait till they find out it's only sleeping.

"This is gonna be the best Halloween ever! OK guys, get in!"

Well. It's full of Diet Pepsi. Jose, grab those Mentos.

It's more impressive when you see them all play jump-rope with it at the same time.

Alright, bring her out! (Dude, this is the best bachelor party ever!)

Oh, I get it...Indiana Jones is afraid of snakes, so he must REALLY be afraid of a BIG snake. Oh, Lucas, you master of visual humor, you!

"Just because you 'saw it in a cartoon' does not mean real snakes can be used like a slingshot."

1. Seven Peruvians + 20-foot boa constrictor 2. ??? 3. Profit

Snake fondler. That's a dirty job.