Other Craptions

Phong seemed pleased with his choice, but he would shortly discover that Croc beats Paper.

How Hillary Clinton remembers her trip to the zoo...

chinese food again?!

the problem with heavy drinking is you wake up in the strangest places

The alligator gasped in terror as he realized he had been caught in the Chinese throat hold.

The tryouts to replace Steve Irwin had an amazing 32% survival rate.

Despite being ridiculed by his peers, Larry knew if he was patient in leaving his mouth open food would eventually come to him.

Fuck, I hate modern dance.

"Ok, yes... yes, I can hear his thoughts now. He's... he's angry.... and... HUNGRY."

And wouldn't you know it? The gator was hungry again an hour later.

Ming was not quite sure why his head hurt, but he had a hunch that it had something to do with sticking his head in the crocodiles mouth.

Louisiana's foreign exchange program has its critics.

It's the kind of lesson you learn only once, but whether you ever use it again depends which side of the glass you're on.

"What's that, son? No, you can't come out until you apologize for hitting your sister."

Real alligator-skin hats quickly became vogue, even if they were too heavy to wear standing up.

China's answer to their population problem was a bit unorthodox...but it made for a good show.

Free Tibet? I was only kidding.

Sanjaya Malakar's career really too a nose dive after American Idol, but most people agreed it was an improvment.

Against all reasonable opposition, attention whoring will nevertheless be a demonstration sport at the 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing.

"Oy, you ready, Tang? Ok, mate, now I'm gonna stick my thumb up 'is butt!" "What? Nooo-!"

The competition for the Darwin Awards was particularly fierce this year.

It's all fun and games until someone loses a head.

The Asian equivalents of Siegfried and Roy did not fare much better...

"Would you kindly remove your head from my mouth? I'd appreciate it. Thanks."

This is why the Chinese break-dance team take the gold every Olympic.

Wow, this is fantastic! No horns, no hooves, just soft and pink!

'see you later, alligator..' 'not so fast, crocodile..'

The kids ejoyed everything about the show except the blood. So much blood.

Mongo couldn't wait till he could flee to America and become a dry cleaner...

It wasn't until both performers started shooting ping pong balls out of their asses did Lorraine realize she'd taken her daughter to a sex show.

"And now Tutu will swallow our THIRD audience participant!"

Looks like the new brand-awareness campaign for Lacoste has gone to a new level

for my next trick i will get a stupid human to put his head in my mouth. then eat him.

PETA's protest idea to feed themselves to animals, while poetic, would have worked better if they weren't hated by everyone.

Zio didn't really think out the job ad...perhaps he should have known "Get HEAD from an ALLIGATOR 5 times a day" was too good to be true.

The Crockodiles try to stir up consumer interest in "Crock-o-pillows," the pillows so comfortable you'll never wake up.

the chinese version of the harlem globetrotters are HARDCORE.

when 'opie' the tiny dancing worm showed up at the zoo, people began to do the strangest things to impress him.

After being raised by plovers, he really didn't understand why everyone was shocked as he cleaned out the crocodile's teeth.

Look at me! I'm an American! Bwahahaha

"Okay, I've poured the diet-coke in, now hand me the Menthos!"

Sometimes when you make bets when drunk...you just have to renig once you sober up.

Shit, everyone is staring...do I have something in my teeth?

If youre gonna commit suicide you might as well go out in style

Other than that, Taiwanese Disneyland is pretty much the same.

I so better get laid for this.

On live television, they tell you not to wave at the cameras for a reason.

What at first appeared to be an accidental death was later ruled as suspicious when it was discovered the victim's shampoo had been switched with mayonnaise.

The moment when Sarit realized that he should seriously reconsider his philosophy of "I'll take any job that lets me work in my pajamas".