Other Craptions

Nirvana! And make it fast!

Jesus may be my copilot, but Buddha knows where all the hot chicks hang out.

Buddha is Mexican?

it would have been bad karma to NOT pick up this hitchhickker

When a St. Christopher on the dashboard isn't quite enough...

I'm telling you, they are NOT going to have change for this at the toll-booth.

My new GPS is driving me insane! "Turn left on Broadway and give a sandwich to the homeless guy. Go straight 5 miles and turn left to reach the Temple." And when I searched for strip clubs it said: "Did you mean, 'Museum of Fine Arts?'" Goddammit. *L

His guru told him he needed to take a spiritual journey. He may have missed the point.

"I don't care if you're an enlightened deity, I called shotgun! Deal with it backseat bitch."

Bob, I think people are going to notice we robbed that shrine.

Fuck you, it was on sale

Toyota: Because the path to enlightenment is a long and hard one.

every time Buddha tried tried to get out and walk, he was "re in car nated"

But it is filled with yummy milk chocolate?

"You know Phil, the Smithsonian might consider buying our knockoffs if we dressed like Tibetan monks, and..maybe if we actually tied it down. Y'know, like it was priceless?"

"Damnit Dave, can't you just buy me jewlery like normal husbands?"

come on man it would have looked silly if we put it one the hood

Damn it! The left lane is for religious icons! I always get behind some idiot on the way to work!

Sick of joyless quick killing, Super Sonic decided to stalk his prey.

My other car is Enlightenment.

After years of planning the Buddhist "Pope mobile" goes from the drawing board to the testing phase.

"...and he raised his hand, and the traffic parted..."

Jesus is a cock-block, Mohammed likes killing people, and Buddha is a back-seat driver. Ah, fuck it..

Winner, "Most Fiendishly Clever Body Dump, Disguised Corpse Division," in the Serial & Spree Killer Olympics.

I told Hank that he didn't have to disguise himself to sneak into the drive-in theater, but Hank always does shit the hard way.

Buddha approves this vehicle.

Karma? Truckma!

It seemed like a good idea for transport, but then they realised they couldn't fit through any drive-thru's...

butter buddha better balance because ballast bounces

You asked for enlightnment, you got it! TOYOTA!

"Who do you think you are, running that red light like that? Jesus Christ?"

When on teh run from the law after stealing a priceless solid gold buddha statue from its resting place of thirteen hundred years, better make it a TOYOTA.

Tony Jaa is totally going to somersault into the bed of that truck and reclaim his village's stolen, sacred Buddha statue.

"I'm trying to be humble here, but Jesus didn't need the stretch Hummer all to himself."

"Eutopia isn't exactly what I'd been expecting...SHIT!!! Don't tell me I picked the wrong religion!!!"

Toyota: the brand most deities trust.

"Buddha Buddha, which way to the fish-market?" "The way is open only to those who refrain from suffering." "Yes, but do I turn left or right?" "There is no left or right. Rather, turn inward." "What the hell does that even mean? I shoul

You're kidding, right? Everyone knows Buddha prefers Nissan.

how about use some of that "enlightenment" to stay in your own fucking lane. jackass.

As Buddha saw the 3 o'clock traffic he knew he had a long way to enlightenment.

"...Then after I crashed into the pole I checked the rear-view mirror again and it was gone"

The mexicans thought they'd gotten away with stealing his truck, but Buddha had other plans...

Buddha Buddha Buddha Buddha rockin' everywhere, rockin' everywhere... I saw you, Miss new Buddha.

In April of 1972, a crack military commando team...and Buddah...were arrested for a crime they didn't commit. If you have a problem. If no one else can help. And if you can find them. Maybe you can hire the A-Team....and Buddah.

Ahh, quit bitchin'. It's not as though it could fit around the rear view mirror.

Christians drive with a plastic Jesus on the dash and Buddhists do this.

Dave don't look now but I think that gold guy is still following us.

Well, Jesus rode into Jerusalem on donkey, so...

"Are you happy now Frank? 'Oh at least were going to have the best souvenir,'you said. We are going to hell Frank. Or worse, reincarnated as part of the Cracked Writing staff."