Other Craptions

Above: Artist's rendering of 93% of the internet.

"I said LUKE I am your FATHER..No no, FATHER, FATH..ER. Dammit Luke, I said I'm your FA...Ugh, damn signal. I'll just tell him when I see him."

"And this is where our dorm has pillow-fights. Wanna go?" "Not right away, child. The force has prevented me from standing up for a few minutes."

I find your lack of signal...Disturbing

2 Girls, 1 Sith Lord

"Ha Ha Ha, look at that fat kid acting like a Jedi. What a tool!"

How does everyone have a blueprint of the Deathstar on their cellphone!?

Take another, I blinked.

"OK, I know how to get into my voicemail, but how do I... oh, I see."

Fuck this caption shit. I can't think straight. Those girls are pure hotness and I would sell my grandmother to gypsies to be with them.

"He said you're WHAT? Asshole! Get him on the phone and I'll force choke him via satellite."

Txt: Ob1knob: If u shld dlt my txt now, I'll bcome more pwerful that u culd evr imagine. Rofl

"Yes, that's actually a picture of my face before this whole respirator-thing." "You look a lot like Hayden Christiansen" "I get that a lot."

"Nice pictures, ladies. Now excuse me while I go Force Choke the chicken."

"Wow, I never realized this helmet made me look like a giant gasping penis..."

"Oh shit! Maybe I'm not his father..."

eHarmony does it again.

The third girl, even airbrushed, just didn't compare in hotness, so we got creative.

I didn't think an Ewok could bend that way...

We replaced their friend Mikoto with Sith Lord Darth Vader, let's see if they notice...

I don't get it. Why is 55378008 funny?

That sound you hear is every teenage boy in the world consecutively jacking off.

"Yes Emperor, I've been drifting through space for two weeks trying to get a signal. Yeah it's been hell...Right, see you in a week." *click* "I think he bought it."

"Just type 'helmet stuck, pickup PLZ'"

"Yes, I think those panties will be sufficiently soiled for my needs."

After Star Wars, Darth Vader tried to parlay his name recognition into a hit Japanese sitcom. Hilarity ensued.

Girls... 'Inhale' Who's Your Daddy?

While Darth Vader was distracted by two cute Asian girls, the young and rambunctious Luke Skywalker flies off to destroy the Death Star.

Darth Vader realizes the best thing about the Force: Masturbating without hands.

This must be from saturday night...I was so high.... who do you think got it? (^)

"I always thought those movies make my ass look big..."

"no no no no, you also have to dodge your own tail while trying to eat the apples..."

Upon zooming in on the so-labelled "hot chick", Vader realised it was, in fact, a dude... He was confused... The force flowed through him stronger than ever!

"i can figure out most of this gibberish, but what the fuck does 'ttyl' mean?"

This pic helps me get a grip on some hard issues that I've been tugging at for quite some time now.

So you're saying I can operate the Death Star from this phone? My iPhone doesn't do that. Hmm.

"Look forget where I am.....just be sure to have the new death star up and running before my return. End communication......Now ladies im not paying you to hold my intergalactic comms device"

"You have become quite skilled in the ways of Tap Tap Revolution. Impressive."

"I can't believe she fit the whole Ewok in there."

Is that really me? That must have been one hell of a party last night

"That's you? Oh, I'll be training with my lightsaber tonight...."

The Force says you two will give your phone numbers...

"That Sakura is so hot. If I were Nartuto, I'd totally bang her."

Could you please dial my mom? These gloves are so fucked up...

Japan has a guy dressed as Vader picking up all the girls? Damn. I guess I'll try Brazil then.

"Yes, nice pussy"

I see...so that's what bukkake is.

Vader looks at the picture of the two hotties making out just moments before...and contemplates suicide because his weenie was roasted on Mustafaar.

"You have a video on your phone of Palpatine doing what??!?!??"