Corpsy
The horrific, wraith-like colossi served as warnings to those crossing the bridge that they were entering the wasteland known as New Jersey.
Wizard
After utterly crushing all opposition and forcing the tennis world to its knees, the Williams sisters discuss the next target for their rage.
IrishTerror
After their unceremonious downfall from the spotlight, Milli Vanilli's hometown let their statues rust and decay.
Corpsy
Guy in white t-shirt: "Yup, birds don't come 'round here no more. Somethin's got'em mighty spooked."
Crenshaw
"Rusty I told you to stay out of that water!" "But Mom...!" "I told you I am NOT going in after you again!"
Fairview
"Was last night the night the clocks changed?" "I don't know...maybe...OH FUCK!" Daylight Savings Time: Enemy of giant vampires.
Ken Buddha
"Yo, check out my art shit. I call it 'Two Big-Ass, Rusty Motherfuckers on a Big-Ass Surf Board.'" "Shiiiiit!"
porsche
Too much like his wife: overbearing, anatomically incorrect and just plain empty on the inside.
Wizard
"Yeah, so what if I made these two statues outta my own crap? Who are you to judge me?"
fieldz
As the statues struggled to keep the top half of the sky up, a clear split was starting to increasingly divide the landscape.
CrenTIScO
While they cost 130,000 orphans their livers, President Bush believed his plan to erect terrorist-repelling liver statues was genius.
randychico
Picture taken before the most amazing and ethereal renditions of "I'm a little teapot" ever seen through human eyes.
Quadrillion
Thus, the alien invasion was halted by relatively small creatures, who God, in his infinite wisdom, saw fit to put upon the earth. Yes, men pissing on their legs, caused the aliens to rust solid.
Wisteria
Local volunteers apply lotion to the legs of the "Venus and Serina" statues to keep them from getting "ashy".
Giddybruce
The Wickerman II: Two Damn Wickermen! Led many to wonder if the Writers' Guild were trying anymore
Lapinot
In 1886, Mesdames et Messieurs, our nation gave yours a sculpture which symbolised America to the world. Today we do the same.
Philip
The arrival of two casually dressed doctors did nothing to alleviate the pain of being a rusty, piece of shit sculpture.
Corpsy
"Just because we're made of metal, it does not mean that are hearts cannot break." "How's that?" "They were constructed from less durable metal."
emossy
Large; ugly; useless. And still the two black guys think about stealing them. ^ can't beat that.
usedretainers
The statues, entitled "WHYYYYYYYY Did I Cut My Own Hair, It Looks Fucking Terrible" comissioned by the United States Barber Federation was perfect, and served as a constant reminder to the people.
Chamale
Though nearly destroyed by rust, this ancient sculpture still clearly depicts a wife telling her husband to move the invisible couch into the corner.
Cyanide
The city was smart. The statues were both asethically appeasing and a great place to urinate
Turd-ala-flambe
My doctor is stupid, I don't have the attention span of a three year ol... Ooh! Two giant rusty women!
becco
Even aliens have problems: Example A) A pair of mates fight over who gave who rust, and where they caught it from.
Radzilla
"See, I told you Earth was a great place. 'We come in peace small Earth dwellers', 'We are your friends'." "Um, Steve? You wanna tell your new 'friend' to stop fucking my leg?"
rollingStone
Notice how the 3 black people in this picture are intrigued by the statues, whereas the 2.5 white people couldn't care less.
planB
His wife swore she never had an affair, but when their children bore a striking resemblance to the evergreen down the street, he began to get suspicious.
Nebulon
The edited version of the Day the Earth Stood Still didn't reveal what the army did to Gort's family.
Wizard
Jill and Wendy still can't figure out why they are unable to dunk a basket, despite their abnormal heights.
Roland1232
Where are our polygons, God? Where are those high-res textures you promised? WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN US?!
squiggle
Defamer won't accept your comments, no-one likes your Craptions. At least you're not the artsy clot who sculpted these contraptions.
lord_galathon
Incredible growing people, just add water and they'll grow up to 500% their original size.
taka
Nothing angered the mud people more than well-conditioned and blow dried monkey hair.
Chrome
Through this controlled test, we have uncovered the catalyst for the decline of human population: where men become more interested in severed monkey heads on poles than wet, muddy t-shirts.
namesnatcher
and the WIRE PEOPLE stared in awe at the bridge, and asked in a stunned voice, "Cable cars and cable tv too?"
Fairview
This tribute to women's basketball stirred controversy for a second time in the sport's recent history.
jamasian_man
And then Januss took his alien son to see The Bridge, which they also could not go on.
Deathblade666
After being inert for years, the bridgepeople where coming to take back what was theirs
scoob
Milli Vanilli didn't win a Grammy after all, but they have a nice view of the bay.
gobbyrich
The statues had travelled far, overcome many obstacles only to be told to go back to where they came from, by an irate black man who didn't want their "type" around here!
milf0rd
Limbo good,Limbo fine. Everybody gets a chance,C'mon and move your body down Do the limbo dance
mrgopherguts
Once the border fences were up, the Mexicans figured the best way to test to see if they were electrified was to toss some of their spare kids at it. They figured they can always make more.
Ranger
Holy Fuck! The Amazonian Wire Bitches from Talus4 are attacking our bridge! Quick...get the wire snips!!!
yellowdrakex
"WATASHI NO NAMAEH OH HANASHITE KUDASAI, BITCH!" (Note* My Japanese is not that good. Feel free to re-translate.)
grungergeez
Archaeologists today discovered Hitler’s private dart board underneath Berlin
Derec
"Terminate with extreme prejudice...and look abtholutely fabulouth doing it, boyyys"
Ranger
Michael Jackson corners toddler at waterside...filmed at 6! http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=19&sku=ENGL-CD00284
Gambler
"To be quite honest", said Michael to Pete as his yacht rounded the corner, "I'm not sure our new black friends truly understand the concept of hide-and-seek."
beanvoncool
Early versions of the Iron Man script included an iron nemisis and a macarena showdown. The producers however thought they took the title too literally. As for the macarena....(see Iron Man 2)
chelsea_137
If you thought action mans smooth patch fucked kids up, you were simply unprepared for the Japanese
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