whyimhot
Obama tried to court the youth vote, while Clinton appealed to mostly old chicks.
monsterjavabass
Mommy, where do black people come from? "Well honey, you see the stork lets them out of a prison cell onto the street..."
crispy
Hurry up! We only have about 10 more minutes for our break before we have to get back to Andy Dick's hallucination.
123456
Girl: "My outfit is made out of real feathers" Guy: "Oh yeah? My outfit is made out of real babies"
AbbyNormal
Nicole Richie may be an inexperienced mother, but hell, she's trying her best.
NeoRudeboy
After a move this gentlemanly, Teddy knew he'd be tappin them tail feathers later, ridiculous costumes or no. The rohypnol sno-cone was just extra insurance...
meruvingian
It turns out the question used to be longer, but people were just too lazy to say "Why did the chicken and the guy dressed in a baby outfit carrying an oversized bird-cage cross the road?"
flyingmnky
Little did Tweety Bird know he was falling prey to Sylvester's latest scheme....
aborym
The restaurant mascot and sandwich board bearer strike of 2008 cost the industry literally tens of dollars.
Stretch
"Did you see that guy back there wearing the Member's Only jacket? Ha! What a tool."
popper357
The S and M scene on 42nd Street was never the same after Disney came to town.
Aethelend
It may not have been the most romantic Valentines they had spent together, but dammit, she had to give him points for creativity. Later that night, she found out what the birdcage was for.
Tofuloaf
The uniform wouldn't get him laid anytime soon, but "canary handler" at the Taffy mines was still the cushiest job in Wonderland.
MuscleMilk
"bitch you listen to me, you get in the damn cage and act as a bird till i am satisfied..then you get your crack cocaine"
shellandflame
"Have you seen a couple pandas in bondage gear anywhere? I'm supposed to meet them for a photo shoot."
pearshapeboy
Luckily, Clive already had 'the talk' on protecting oneself from genital chirpies.
grumnut1
Now Todd, the doctor said no kinky sex for at least a week.Thank God you brought the contraceptive.
vasrchr
Geez! Did you see that guy back there with the black belt and brown shoes? Some people just don't know how to dress!
JasonF
"There he is! We've got him now. Quick, try to blend in while I set the trap. Here, drink this Coke."
Crenshaw
The horrible answer to the question, "Can you tell me how to get...how to get to Sesame Street?"
Yabels
Sinatra's original lyrics: "Start spreading the news, my big black baby's leaving today. He's got a Big Bird wanna-be, in old New York". The record execs had to change it, but this album cover remains.
BunnyBordeaux
America's Next Top Model with new hosts, Flava Flav and Tara Reid..Work it!
darkstorm
The lady was understandably cautious of the young man's motives in offering her free room and board.
darkstorm
The young lady was understandably wary of the young man's offers of room and board in exchange for changing his diapers.
lee_johnson
BRITNEY SPEARS HIRES TWO NEW NANNY'S TO SHOW THE COURT SHE IS SERIOUS ABOUT RAISING CHILDREN
KermitChambers
Before the night was through, she would be his for the taking. oh, yes should.
Baker.Street
The list of "other dates" that the home ec. class handed out to keep the teens from having sex before they were ready was just getting more and more ridiculous.
lawdragon
Mom said education was the most important...but Big Boob and her brother Sissy thought perhaps it was the choice of sperm doner Mom picked...
MuscleMilk
Bertha the Bird said: "I'm not the [i]feather[i] of that baby, clearly you have been fucking the neighbor"
theseattleseven
Once Japan became the fashion captial of business attire, American dignity didn't stand a chance.
porsche
After being rejected by Roy Rogers and Nathan's, they took their fast-food mascot quest elsewhere.
john0
Due to the 2007-2008 writers strike Dick Wolf had to resort to a new low in order to produce the long awaited pilot for the new Law and Order Series. Law and Order [IPM] Interracial Pedestrian Misdemeanors
phreesh
The pickup line, "Hey baby, wanna get laid?" as demostrated by the 49th Street Players.
JAIlovar
With the writer's strike showing little hope of ending, CBS get desperate. They consider airing a show featuring a black man.
Fairview
Many of the displaced citizens of Neverland Ranch emigrated to New York City, hoping for fresh start.
alpofreely
SWFC seeks growed up baby with prop cage. You know what I mean. Hung, but absolutely no Wayans.
pronk48
What kind of people just go around crossing streets and not walking on the white solid lines?
vasrchr
The myth of alligators living in the sewers of NY City is just that . . . a myth.
lobeline
How to REALLY confuse children with what Black History Month is really all about
SamFultonSr
Honey - you know I love you, but before we get married there is this "one" thing I wanted to try.
JackHare
The ad campaign would be slick, hot, now, 'cyber'. The firm needed to know what 'the Internet kids' were into. All the buzz said the right place to ask was a site called 'Something Awful'.
detroitsmisterx
After leaving Diddy and failing as a solo artist, Fonzworth Bentley found being the personal assistant of Big Bird's mistress less fulfilling...
Gamer.Elite
This just in: Two New York City adults were run down by a motorist today. The two victims were the stars of a new Broadway musical entitled "Revenge on Whitey and Humans in General". When questioned, the driver stated the he had "seen enough crazy
sethesthesia
"So why did we get kicked off American Idol again?" "I dun told you, I don't know! They're jerks! I spent forever on these costumes!"
awdragon
SHOCK: Pacman gleefully watches former nemesis Blinky attack a baby in New York City. "And Pacman just stood back and laughed, drinking his damn coffee," said one onlooker. Developing...
awdragon
SHOCK: Pacman watches gleefully while former nemesis "Blinky" attacks baby on street. "And he just stood there drinking his damn coffee," said one onlooker. Developing...
awdragon
SHOCK: Pacman watches gleefully as former nemesis Blinky attacks a baby in the street. "and he just stood there drinking his damn coffee," said one onlooker. Developing...
Lizardking1726
After finally breaking free of their cage, The Baby and The Chicken were tragically killed when hit by a platypus driving the Ghost Mobile.
MitchConner
Going for It: Darrius Zermif is awarded his Gold medal, moments after learning his fuzzy pink prosthetic legs would not get him disqualified from the Gay Olympics.
Ronsonic
They aren't actually going somewhere with that stuff, they're just into walking around like that.
MisterCode
Sitting quietly, Jamie was glad of two things. One, that he wore his yellow shirt today. And two, that unlike some people... he's had sex.
grumnut1
The cast of Star Wars VII " The Sand People Get Pissey" are annoyed by the inclusion of Panic! At The Disco on the soundtrack.
DesertEagle
I don't care what those cracker bastards at CTW say, I'm going to make it on to Sesame Street one way or another!
DesertEagle
Well, Paula liked my enthusiasm, but Simon said I shouldn't sing ever again.
Ranger
Um...yeah...ha, ha... I like my eggs unfertilized in the morning. NO...never heard that one homie...how does it go? Why don't you get some cardboard and fucking break dance to pay your rent, smart-ass?! http://neilsnotes.com/?page=15&catid=38&sku=E-
Ranger
Why did Homie Huey cross the road? Because his dick was stuck in the white chick(ens) ass! So... send her this: http://neilsnotes.com/?page=15&catid=28&sku=E-CD00379
Ranger
Why is the black person carrying their own prison. Oh...never mind...(giggle)... http://neilsnotes.com/?page=15&catid=38&sku=E-CD00295
Ranger
In the future... black people will carry their own prison cells. www.NeilsNotes.com
PopsicleStix
MADtv always scrapes to the bottom of the barrel for new recurring characters in their never-ending battle to be better than "Saturday Night Live".
Treb
Baby: Hey, Wild Wings! Are you regular, or Extra Krispy? Chick: Lick my Nippleless torso Slave Baby!
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