Craptions Classics January 16, 2008

When you lock your keys inside your apartment your quadriplegic friend isn't always the best one to call for a boost through the window.

frrrrrrunkis

Other Craptions

Anything that isn't a dead body is hot lava!

bubsfoster

99...100.. READY OR NOT HERE I COME!

Tag119

It just wasn't any fun playing hide-and-go-seek with "Joe the Retard"

imthe_d

Its times like this I wish I hadn't killed you.

AdjectiveNoun

As he approached Julie from behind the bush, Jim knew he was stealthy. But when he saw how close Doug had managed to get, he knew he had been out-matched.

JasonF

The date wasn't going well. Phil's "human alphabet" wasn't as much fun as Jenny had hoped.

jules

Chelsea composed herself. All she had to do was say Barack Obama had robbed them and started stabbing and she would be in the clear.

mmpl

Patsy was tired of her dates faking death to get rid of her. He'd have to breathe sometime, and when he did, she'd know it!

cigjonser

When CPR goes horribly, horribly wrong.

TrevorT

Unfortunately, the sport of urban-human-surfing has not caught on.

JZuck49

And even then, she was still unable to reach the top of the window.

villike

crazy glue... works

rupertvdb

After years of having sex with his backpack and wishing it was a real girl, his wish was suddenly granted that night.

thewarholian

Maybe 5th & Crenshaw at 2:23 am wasn't the best time & place to get a back walking massage, but damn did it feel good...

flyingmnky
Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

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