Other Craptions

"I find the easiest way to check the gender is just to flip 'em over like this. You'll wanna hold 'em with both hands so they don't kick you."

It was clear that Dave had missed the first half of the CPR class

And thats when Bob realized. He was gay

Best. Job interview. Ever.

Broken-hearted, Sue Ellen couldn't understand why no one wanted to grab her ass, especially with her sexy bleach blonde mullet.

"you put your right hand in, you pull your right hand out, you put your right hand in and shake it all about..."

Heimlich manoeuvre. Bob Heimlich manoeuvre.

Todd demonstrates to his Fraternity brothers the most effective method for using new "supository roofies". Reviews are skeptical.

White people's idea of "SMACK THAT BITCH UP"!!

We like to call this a "kegel stand"

Joe would do anything to take attention away from his David Hasselhoff tanktop.

All hell broke loose when Kim announced the new "Find The Candy Bar On My Body" competition at this years Special Olympics...

The redneck pregnancy test is a lot more fun than any you could buy at a store.

And to think, Bob almost said no when his sister asked him to come to her lesbian rally.

"Ring before spring," Katie whispered, "Ring before spring."

The only reason to become a male cheerleader.

Antiques Roadshow: Genital Edition

Dammit Lou, that's not where the catheter goes. Cough it out.

Vacuum in the ass makes the beer go up. Harvard keg-stand team.

"Omar like wide, childbearing hips. Good, good. Omar pay your sorority 2 cows, 1 bushel of wheat and AK-47 as bride price."

A superb demonstration of "The Hymen-romoval"

At a high school reunion twenty years later, Dexter and Melvin finally exacted their revenge on the bully that had tortured them for so many years.

Mr. & Mrs. Ming are proud to announce the birth of their son, Yao.

As he pulled the newborn free, Dr Ricardo wondered how long she'd been in there. Then, being a professional, he smacked it's ass regardless.

True, his home wasn't quite the Playboy Mansion, but this photo of Jimmy Kimmel proves that the Juggy after-auditions party can be just as fun.

Richard Simmons didn't realize it at the time, but the "Bottoms Up Jazzercise" would be an event that changed his life.

If you're lowering a woman into a vat of cement, does it really matter if you cop one last feel? She should thank you really.

Mr. & Mrs. Ming are proud to announce the birth of their son Yao.

Being so blonde they forgot their props, the Hooters restaurant team does their best to recreate the Iwo Jima flag raising on Patriots day.

Dude...lets make a wish!

As their hands began to slip, Randy began to regret his spur-of-the-moment decision to shave his legs that morning.

Hey look, Rodger Federer

"What puts us above the other toy manufactures is here at Mattel we use USDA prime dumb blond to make our Barbies - Now just feed her into the machine like this and don't worry about the others; they're very docile creatures."

"See that, I told you." "I stand corrected, I haven't seen a tuck like that since Silence of the Lambs."

Bill was really having a tough time coming up with an excuse as to where he lost his wedding ring.

Jim's friends help him turn his frown upside down.

And as i held her i couldn't help but think, "This bulge looks familiar"

Yo, photgraphers! Everyone act natural...

Once you apply seasoning, you just have to hang it up to air-dry for two weeks. Here's one I prepared earlier....

It was easy to put money into, but Dave's experimental piggy bank had issues with withdrawal.

The original draft of Fargo had a very different vision of the woodchipper scene, before the Coen Brothers split with Girls Gone Wild.

Utilizing the lessons he learned playing with his straws at Applebees as a child, Dan applied pressure to the opposing orifice so that no beer would escape out of Kenny's mouth.

"Hey! I thought u were a natural blonde!"

Mmm... Mongo like rump roast.

"Just keep the twinkie in there! We will lure that alien out in no time!!"

Get her knees further apart, let the bats out...this one REALLY FUCKING STINKS!! http://neilsnotes.com/?page=15&catid=23&sku=E-CD00260

5-second rule!!!

No Todd! We don't let the gerbil out till you finish the keg!

"Ya know, Bill, I really do appreciate your help... but did you have to stick your finger in my ass?" "No, probably not.... but it happened."