Other Craptions

Godzirra !!!!

Due to an over-populated military and poor road maintenance, some lower ranking asian military pull speed bump detail.

"What if they come from a different side?"

Oh, it's alright, no one can see us, sir. We're wearing camouflage.

The Vietnamese army forgot they only had 1 blocker Lemming for this level, and used it too early.

And so the phrase "Cluster Fuck" was born.

Um...I think there's something wrong with the respawn point...

Taking military advice from American vaudeville is usually a bad idea, but the "Clown Car" method of troop movement worked surprisingly well for these Korean soldiers.

"Okay, seriously guys, you can't all hide behind this car. Where the shit are all your cars? If you didn't bring your own car to hide behind, go home. This one's for me and Steve."

Without warning, a Seoul police cruiser is suddenly t-boned by the 31st Infantry, B company.

Q:How many Asian militants does it take to change a tire? A:21 . 1 to change the tire and the rest to shoot him if he does it wrong .

After washing it yet again, the guys from Precinct 23 were determined to get rid of that damn pigeon.

"Splinter Cell: The MMORPG" SEEMED like a good idea on paper...

The army tried desperately to recreate the glory of the Iwo Jima flag raising...but tipping over Toyotas just wasn't as powerful of an image.

Human ramp's all set up Sarge. That sniper's gonna be sorry he fucked with Dirtbike Darrel.

Hurry! The light is about to change!

A near perfect execution of the "fish in a barrel" urban combat technique.

Ever wonder where your other 29 lives for Contra wait their turn to play? Apparently, it's behind the police SUV in level 4.

-"Is everyone locked and loaded?" -"You're sure this is his 3rd strike?" -"Ya. And he's definitely loitering."

"But Sarge, I didn't get a gun!" "yeah me too!" "me an' all" "For Christ's sake! just bloody point then!"

In a nation where carjackers outnumber their potential victims 20 to 1 complications were bound to arise.

"THERE!" Bartholomew shouted. He hoped that the general noticed his hand and voice as the one to identify where the police car was.

State police are on the scene of a 23 pedestrian pileup on the city's south side. Witnesses say they were following too closely when they rounded the icy corner. No injuries were immediately reported.

After 200 years the hole had finally been drilled and the Chinese army began slowly creeping though, beginning the invastion of the United States.

Traffic stops in guam come with a 1 in 10 chance of completely shitting yourself.

The experimental Gay Airborn Division was especially vulnerable to artillery due to their tendency to stick together in tightly packed formations.

In some other countries, attempts to stage "Washington Crossing the Delaware" have met with mixed results.

In the Japanese version of Iwo-Jima the soldiers proudly raised a Toyota...

Someone behind me is definitively gay.

I spy, with my little eye, something that is... red. Stop, stop, Pvt. Vong got it first. Okay, Vong, take the shot.

The best way to negotiate with midgets is to approach them at their level.

the new magnetic uniforms seemed like a good idea at the time.

How many South Koreans does it take to change a flat tire?

Corporal Chang signaled for the rest of the company to move up. They were concealed for now, but someone was bound to spot the platoon sooner or later.

Pleeeease tell me that's your gun barrel Yao.

The disabled army we're given the choice, wheelchairs OR guns.

Due to a horrific typographical error in accounting, the soldiers thought they were invulnerable to Godzilla's attacks behind a 1989 Nissan Pathfinder.

Hey who touched my bum!!

"We shall defeat those who do not believe in well trimmed roadside shrubbery"

Tsunami: The Musical

Poor Patty Hearst can't even go to the bank anymore without something like this happening.

The "Godzirra!" joke is just kinda too easy here.

that 12year old hacker holding them off must be some aim with a water gun

Group sex in the DMZ...

He couldn't stop thinking about it. So Chang put the tip of his gun to the ground and whispered into Tran's ear. "You were great last night."

In China it rains sideways.

"Where did they get an army?" "It...fell off the back of a truck, sir."

hey... guys? is that thing a grena...

hey... guys? isn't THAT thing a grena...