kneightx
His village destroyed. The one he called "Father" murdered. His girl taken. "Yes," thought Hefty, "this time Gargamel has f**ked with the wrong smurf".
Mrfortesque
Back in the day, everybody was a real man. Fingernails were like iron, hairs were like splinters, and stubble was so fucking hard we had to shave with power tools....
bloodthorn6
Lars came to realize that grinding metal directly into his eyes actually was more enjoyable than the Grey's Anatomy marathon his girlfriend made him watch the night before.
Technohawk
Axe body spray sales plummeted today when a translation error was discovered on European cans.
Poom
"Nailz", the newest member of the blue man group, had a tough exterior and was kind of a dick, but he could play the shit out of a paint drum.
colsen
I tried to think of something funny. Really, I did. But this is just too badass. Could you laugh to his face? Or what's left of it?
SamuraiRobot
..and this is why they put safety labels on things. Some people really do need to be told "Do not direct sparks at face"
fettbass
With the new Gillette mach 250000 you too can shoot sparks all over your goddamn face.
pizzamogul
Ironically enough, smoking was way down on the list of things that Hans did that were bad for his health.
omgtehlindsay
Hans clearly didn't have one of those "Carol never wore her safety glasses.." posters in his high school chemistry lab.
nuro
"Yes", Orlock said wryly while lighting a smoke in the most uniganiable of ways, "i do eat babies".
Mr.Birchfield
Lucky Diamond Rich could see the sparks between himself and his new favorite ax.
Greyson06
People still didn't get his joke. He said he was PUZZLED by the fact that his lighter never caught on.
iJosh
Traditional tattooing methods were just not extreme enough for Jason. If it didn't involve a cigarette, an axe and a large amount of sparks then he didn't want to fucking know.
MrWolf12
Even as she watched the sociopath sharpen his axe, for some reason, she realized getting away would probably be very easy.
MuscleMilk
"Hey," thought Zach, "maybe if i melt my face off daddy will finally realize that all i ever really wanted was some attention."
codespyder
"I am invincible. I have downed this bottle of Jaegar and am still alive. Nothing can stop me now. And to prove it, I will now French kiss a diamond-tipped grinder."
idiotnationlive
that was the moment when Phil thought that maybe he could live with braces for a few more years.
Blakk
When he realized that smoking no longer made him look cool, Greg decided to take it to the next level.
monkey_marshal
Having already tattoed his face and really wanting that Winnie the Pooh ink, Ian proceded to melt off the old skin to leave room for it!
NeoRudeboy
The midget attacked with his axe, but Warrior Bob calmly deflected the blow with his invincible cigarette. See kids? Cigarettes ARE good for you.
pizzamogul
Carl is as cool as they come, but unfortunately the lack of eyebrows turns off even the most adventurous of chicks.
fiatboomer
New Camel Magnesium Menthols! For those who demand only the unhealthiest smoke possible.
Weisolas
Today, the combination Lighter/Hatchet/Metal Grinder reached stores everywhere and topped most Christmas lists.
cavalier_gor
...and on that fateful day, Jimmy became the first person to be hit in the face by his own powersaw
JewelsVern
They said the Buddha's jewelled eye was cursed. Indy didn't believe in curses. But the Buddha did.
Cypher296
This has to be the worst craption picture I have ever seen.... your loosing it man.... so sad
lady_gwenefar
I know those nicotine cravings can be brutal, but even if you're out of matches, don't you think that lighting a cigarette this way is just a tad extreme?
spruce488
Stewart, always one for the spotlight, couldn't light his cigarette with a lighter like everybody else. He just had to show off.
Vankook
For some reason he just couldn't shake, Olaf began to question his plastic surgeon's derma-brasion abilities.
yahoo
The writeres strike is taking its toll. Meet the new Hero, Marty. His power? Doing anything for attention.
Dire_Ria
Ironically it turned out this photo was not of the actual Darwin Award but one of its many contestants.
acrossthesea
after forgetting his lighter ,jeff suffered third degree burns while trying to find a way to light his ciggarette.
leftybigguns
Seriously, who the fuck wakes up in the morning and thinks to themselves: "You know what sounds like fun...?"
egerrish
Grog could never quite figure out why his newly patented cigarette lighter never caught one.
WEEMAD
As The Pack Moves In To The Kill; I David Attenborough Have The Honour To Mingle Unnoticed. I Am So Well Hidden You Can Only See My Video Camera.
vasrchr
After realizing the guys at the tattoo parlor had inked a jigsaw puzzle on the back of his head, Fritz decided that "someone must pay!"
dhalsim
"hmmmmmmm, how can i make myself look like the most bad-ass mother fucker in this place?"
bloodthorn6
There is a reason why H.P. Lovecraft was banned from designing farm equipment, a reason the sorry bastards of Hoboken, New Jersey were about to discover.
Andyroo
The school's new Resistant Materials supply teacher tended to make the parents nervous....
WickeDwiT
Despite all these efforts, he still couldn't help but wonder if his vagina was showing.
Ranger
C'mon Sparky! Put the axe down! Know someone else that needs a bit of cheering up? Send them: http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=6&sku=ENGL-CD00422
alocracy
The sparks only detracted from the dancing gay Ant tattoo on his arm...he needs more sparks.
Micktrex
The one in the middle is keepin the one the left's big white ball floating with just the power of his almighty farts.
granfaloon
The memeber of the blue man group picture here employs his spark-vision to ward off an angry mob.
ShawnStu
Sorry, the diamond bit isn't working either; your facial tattoo is even more vivid than before. What time is your job interview?
teejay
After realizing his lighter was out of butane, he was forced to extreme measures to satisfy his craving.
killtron
In the waning days of World War III, the Chinese had to resort to their greatest source of ammunition.
rayjuncanayjun
The sparks burn shut the knicks and cuts that result from shaving with an axe. And its a convenient way to keep the blade sharp
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