Other Craptions

There is no use screaming and running in terror over spilt milk

Ever since Godzilla, little Asian boys have been known to run and scream like girls at the sight of big green objects.

...and when the tower came to life and spoke, Fu ran screaming, but Hu affectionately patted it on the chin.

Could Yoshi run to the used panties vending machine before the crates hit the floor? He had a fistful of yen riding on it.

Having finally managed to balance the crates on a perfect 70 degree angle, Toshi excitedly ran to tell mother, umaware that his jealous younger brother Yoshi, was about to completely fuck everything up.

Unfortunately for Kenji since absolutely nobody could watch more than a couple minutes of this low budget film, he couldn't prove that Oliver Stone stole his idea for the film World Trade Center.

The expired milk hit Koji's lower GI on this humid, 95 degree day. Could he make it to the bathroom in time?

Mark had always been terrible at Jenga.

Steven's attempt to reverse the spin of the earth, thereby saving the bottles, was abruptly ended by a faulty sandal strap...and his lack of superhuman speed.

"No, YOU'RE overreacting!"

The Japanese take lactose intolerance to a whole new level.

Exactly two minutes before the second largest Tsunami in Asian history, the Great Milk Tsunami. It could have been prevented, but Toshi's manic screams at Yoshi fell on deaf hears.

With little to no budget for the project, John Woo's next film was rather pathetic.

No way am I working as the Jolly Green Giant's fluffer anymore!

Eric really wanted some chocolate milk but forgot that what goes up, must come down.

In what is being called the most offensive school play of all time, two Asian students re-enact 9/11.

JENGA!!!!!!!

Superman (aka Lark Lent), about to change into his costume - wishes he was never brought up on insane Japanese gameshows... as he tries to save the milk!

Save the 36 gallons of 2%, save the world!

So whose more wrong here? The man fleeing from crates of milk, or the man ginerly tapping said crates to snag a Nesquik before his head is crushed.

Stop him McLovin!

it must be bed time at micheal jacksons house

Steve saw inside the tower's hinge, and what he saw... was himself. And he was terrified.

Somewhere, the ghost of Freud smirked.

You'd run screaming too if an asian jumped out of your ass and tipped over your carefully built tower of milk crates.

Takashi, don't you realize I'm lactose intolerant?!?!

the Chinese 100m sprint team had new tactics in the Olympics

When I find Mr. Chong and tell him about what Danny is doing with the milk, that Assistant to the Assistant Night Manager job is MINE!

whats with all the fucking stereotypical accent bullshit fucking redneck incest bred fucks

try as he might...even chan's phallic sculptures couldn't hide from his debilitating erectile dysfunction.

There was no use running his foot was glued to the floor. That evil milk tower had thought of everything!

The USA reclaims the lead in the race to build a ladder to heaven.

The tsunami victims finally said, "fuck it, no more help is coming. We'll have to raise the rebuilding money ourselves."

The shame was unbearable. Li and his friend had failed in making the worlds biggest dildo.

The lesson learned ....... NO SOCKS AND SANDALS!!

The latest Maury Povich theme: Men Terrified of Falling Crates.

The label says Nitroglice..something. Wait, I'll lift the crate to read it better.

RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN.... its GODZILLA

People and inanimate objects stand crooked in the next generation of V8 commercials.

Once No Child Left Behind started hitting karate dojos, teachers really had to go out of the way to get their worst students to break bricks.

Got milk?

Got Diapers?

Fuck sittin around! YOU touched it last Kenji!

Didn't I tell you not to tickle it too much...now run!!!

Damn it, I should have known that it was a baaad idea to put a water divining stick down there. Its confused as hell and I am too overwhelmed to concentrate!

Chin was running because his friend didn't know the milk had been secretly replaced with nitroglycerin for years.

And that's for milking my cow!

...and that's when Ching realized where the crate monster's mouth was and that the loss of his right limb was inevitable.

...And everyone decided that it was the best brontosaurus model the brothers had ever made.