Other Craptions

You know it's time to run when the beach hobo reaches for more shit to fling.

Sticking it inside a big orange cone does not rank very high on that list of strategies to conceil a boner at the beach.

Rosie O'Donnell should really stay off the beach.

His eyes were that of a curious child as he explained to me, "Dith ith my fwog." The story of Georgie, his unconventional views on bread, and how he turned my world upside down...

This is why Sandman throws sand in people's eyes, just look at him!

...new SPF-7000 from Hawaiian Tropic is guaranteed to prevent freckles, sunburn, skin cancer and consensual sex.

"Well, the little red purse is for more formal occasions... normally, I just keep my crap in this traffic cone."

Fuck you! I'm exfoliating...

If you wanted to sit on this prime spot of the beach, you were going to have to wrestle John for it.

Even on holiday Lou Ferrino can't leave his work at home.

when sex on the beach goes wrong...

a cry for help

Solariums. The horrible, horrible truth.

It puts the lotion on it's skin, it does this whenever it's told.

In his later years, the Incredible Hulk really let himself go.

If your nefarious plans call for excellent camouflage, don't negate it with tacky swin trunks and orange plastic objects.

The prodigal “Son of a Beach”, returning to find his castle destroyed, vows to rebuild with nothing more than a construction cone and a dream…

He can't figure out why his ice cream just isn't selling.

"Cut back to half a pack a day? Why?"

Ever hear about that guy who was cursed by the Gods to count all the grains of sand on the beach by putting them into the orange cone of infinity? Well tonight on Jerry Springer...

"don't get me angey you wouldn't like me when im angry"

Everybody was shocked when David Hasselfhoff showed up for the 50th Anniversary of Baywatch.

Everybody was shocked when David Hasselhoff showed up at the 50th Anniversary of Baywatch.

Faced with the challenge of conquering wide-open spaces, the zombie horde debated means of becoming less overtly terrifying.

Gee, that volcanic eruption sure was fun. Now if I could only find my penis? Nope, not in here.

A shock to comic book fans everywhere, the hulk's sexually confused brother does NOT turn pink when angered.

This cone provided me perfect protection during the sandstorm!

wait a minute...this isn't mine...its much bigger!

What the bloody heck are you doing woman?

What? You don't think the living dead deserve vacations?

Whats in the Red Jug, You Ask? Well,Im Not To Concerned-You See, I Keep My Child Pornography In Small Pylons...

"they think im innocently putting my hand into this cone but im really touching my cock"

You wouldn't like me when I'm sandy.

The prodigal “Son of a Beach”, returning to find his castle destroyed, vows to rebuild with nothing more than a construction cone and a dream…

The first successful attempt to genetically modify a man to blend in with his surroundings.

Inspirational tales of survival: Fred was swallowed by a whale while swimming in the ocean on vacation. Luckily, the whale was incontinent.

It wouldn't be so bag if it wasn't Celine Dion.

Just another day at the beach for Mick Jagger.

nobody noticed the beach monster as he slowly transformed from a traffic cone.

Once a gay beach bum, always a gay beach bum.

How the Grinch stole an orange traffic cone

sand spf 40

sandman's failed decoy or stunt double?

SPF 5000.................$30 Orange cone applicator...$ 3 Being able to say, "I told ya so!" to friends dieing of skin cancer.....Priceless!

After the failed success of Wild Hogs, Ray Liotta went on a crack-sand binge

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