Craptions Classics July 05, 2007

Red bull gives you wings. Blue bull merely gives you hallucinations.


Other Craptions

I'm melting here and those damn Mexicans are stealing my fan.


The T-1000 was less impressive in beta testing.


No, seriously, Mr. Dali! What the HELL does it mean?


The results were conclusive. New York cab drivers were ten times more likely to pick up a melting blue cow with a lump of wood sticking out of it ass than they were a black man.

Brad Harmer

When Maria first began having supernatural visions as a little girl, she could not decipher their meaning. As she grew into adulthood, they still didn't make a damn bit of sense.


Red Bull gives you wings, whereas Blue Bull shoves a snowboard up your ass and melts your sissy face into the pavement. Now THAT'S extreme!


As if waking up in a pool of his own vomit wasn't bad enough, someone had stolen his ice cream despite it's clever hiding place.


The sculpture became much more interesting after John's skateboard accident.

Yo Momma

"Abstact art makes no fucking sense. No fucking sense at all."

"yes it does," said the fan.


The rapid string of cow rapes throughout the city by the infamous "Candyman" caused great public outrage.

wtf am i high

"I think we need a bigger fan."


Kinky Cow. Putting random shit in its ass since 2007.


"I'm turquoise, you bastards," screamed the cow as its entire vocal system melted away. The cow was very fashion-sensitive, and it was good day for turquoise today.


This is just an ironic metaphor for Minnesotan consumerism contributing to global warming. You see, both Babe and Schwan's are destroying themselves.
And illegal immigrant statues are stealing the solution "fan."

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