Other Craptions

Skeletor's bachelor party was AWESOME.

Can you describe the dance troupe that ate your baby?

Trust me, when the cover charge is only 2 pesos at a Tijuana strip club, you want them to keep the masks on.

If necrophilia is still wrong, I don't want to be right.

Girls Night Out of the Living Dead

"No Carol, I don't give a damn how good their personalities are."

Alright, who's the wise guy who opened the Ark of the Covenant?

"Bob, the one on the left just gave me her eye." "You mean she gave you the eye, don't you Mike?" "Um, no. Look it's a blue one."

What happens in Eternia, stays in Eternia.

Why do all of my sex dreams turn horrifying?

If you can't get rid of the skeletons in your closet, you might as well teach them to belly dance.

In the end, the lapdance would cost $20, plus one virgin soul, which unfortunately was not hard to come by.

They can't believe they got college credit for this either.

Three Whores of the Apocalypse. Famine was late for practice and they kicked her out of the group.

I just feel like this performance is lacking any.... um..... life?

Hmm, I guess belly dancing really is a dead art form.

I know a political fundraiser when I see one.

Helter Skeletor

Death Takes a Whore a Day.

Damn. I should have read the fine print in the Quran. I knew there was a catch to those 72 virgins.

"I think the one in the middle likes you, Dave."

Oh sure, HERE it's performance art. When I do it for my high school talent show it's "I don't want to go to the prom with you anymore."

Apocalypse Later... Bellydancing NOW!

The mysterious and erotic Dance of the Three Butterfaces.

"Kind of weird entertainment for a stag party, Dave."

Night of the Living Harem.

Harem? Don't even know 'em.

I'll be damned! If it isn't the horror-juku dolls!

Who does a guy have to know to get some skull around here?

Sometimes in Mexico, it's easier to tell who's a Gringo than others...

First, they'll make you inconceivable. Then the HORROR begins... WES CRAVEN'S BEER GOGGLES! You'll need them. Now in 3-D!

Best. Skullfuck. Ever.

YOU ARE ALL DEAD TO ME!

I see you already have a gong onstage. Good.

"They're just not my cup of tea. I prefer girls with a little more meat on their bones."

Your move "The Living".

Charlie's Muertos

This is the last time i go to the strip club on mushrooms.

"Alright, ladies, what type of skullduggery is this?"

Gypsies, tramps, and banshees.

The new girls were definitely hired on their dancing skills alone this time...

Cleavage: It still counts

Inconceivable! Cracked managed to mix my nightmares and porn folder!

Skeletor was very disappointed when he learned his daughters were Deadheads.

Why doesn't Christianity have scantily-clad babes in skull masks? Where did we go wrong?

Keira Knightly, Lindsay Lohan, and Paris Hilton will be your entertainers this evening.

It’s such a shame to see that they all suffer from skulliosis.

These chicks ARE their own birth control.

OK, that's enough! I am getting sick of cultural diversity. Quit it already!