Other Craptions

And just like that, Todd's Boy Scout troop had become a nuclear power.

Gentlemen, we've done it. We've weaponized the dick joke.

When it didn't launch, no one wanted to admit it was due to Projectile Dysfunction.

In Israel, they would be "terrorists"...but in the South, they're Hobbyists.

Apparently, the US Army has adopted corporate America's practice of Casual Fridays

Your move, Wiley Coyote, your move.

I'm hungry - I'm just gonna press this big red button that says "lunch"

...and somewhere, Dick Cheney is touching himself.

That's a humdinger of a resignation letter, Bob

The Small Penis Support Group on their weekly field-trip.

The Alabama/Mississippi border war is escalating. The rest of the country looks forward to their mutual annihilation.

This is gonna be the best 4th of July ev--

This explains all the dead birds in Arkansas.

Most of General Awesome's BBQs ended in the destruction of a foreign country.

That raccoon has knocked over my garbage can for the last time.

“For Christ’s sakes, George, if you don't stop singing Rocket Man I’m going to tie you to this thing and push the ignition button.”

"Ok, Snookie. Climb in."

There's gopher hunting...and there's Gopher Hunting.

The Postal Workers Union Annual Barbeque

Will somebody PLEASE hold my friggin' beer while I try to fire this thing? Thank you!

A group of Texas rocket scientists decided to take protecting our southern boarder into their own hands.

This day will end badly for someone's compact car.

"C'mon, America! Fight fair! All we have are hockey pucks, our good looks and irony," wailed Canada.

Don't ask U.N., Don't tell Iraq.

We really need to get body armor to our troops overseas.

The soon to be winners of the Mid-West Kite Flying Contest

How Not To Be Seen: Lesson one - don't wear red. Lesson two - don't launch a missile in the middle of a flat desert.

What started as a hobby turned out to be the cause of World War 3.

What do you mean nobody brought matches?!?!?

"Do I press it now?" "No Maynard, keep away from the damn button!" "Now?!" "Dammit Maynard, not now!" "NOW!!" There were no survivors.

The double wide trailer was a facade. Billy Joe had been hiding it for years.

Yep. Red state.

Your move, Burning Man...

"...and lo, they called it 'Land Shark', and there was much rejoicing..."

Knowing is half the battle...and these guys know dick.

The Army: We're such fucking professionals!

"Carl! You dumb ass! You're not wearing any sunscreen! Put your shirt on!"

Frat boys and nuclear weapons: a combination that just can't be beat!

...and not a woman in sight. Ain't that a humdinger?

"Arizona: We REALLY don't like immigrants."

Gone fission.

Missing: One Jolly Green Wang. Owner offering generous reward. No questions asked.

"To Bin Laden, Please accept this humdinger. Signed...America!!"

The "It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time" Club at their 2008 Summer Conference in the Mojave Desert.

I'll give you down votes! One less duplicate account coming up.

Turns out even rocket science ain't rocket science.

“Come on guys hold it steady for Pete’s sakes. It doesn’t take a rocket scien. . .Ok, well maybe it does. But still, let’s get this thing up in one piece.”

10 seconds later, Gary regretted having parked his Buick so near.

Ted Nugent and his band go dove hunting.