Other Craptions

In the lost Epilogue to "Lord of the Flies" the children have to be put down after they fail to readjust to society.

Another village successfully "liberated."

That was the last time Eminem directed his daughter's school play.

"I tell you it doesn't add up, not unless there was another shooter over on the grassy knoll."

You'll come for the battle, but you'll stay for St. Agnes' cookies.

I wish that someday they would re-enact the oldest profession, rather than the second oldest.

Final score: British Imperialism 10, Icelandic Aboriginals 0

the bakery decided that a "Closed. Please call again" sign was soooo passe

Fine! I'll do the dishes tonight! God, why does everything have to be such a big production to you?!

"Well, after this the Germans ought to be real pushovers!"

Loincloths are not the best body armor.

Holy Crap! St Agnes closes at 4:30?!?

Warning: Santa is sick of your shit

Don't musket me, bro!!

you idiots... I said shoot the terrorists not tourists...

We will have a "peaceful relocation." After the genocide, of course.

Hey, We told them to clear the parade path.

"How's the Bake Sale going?" "Bake Sale?"

Perhaps instead of teaching these idiots the "evils of imperialism", they should have taught them "Never bring a spear to a gunfight".

Now, it's Miller Time!

C'mon guys the music's not THAT bad.

Well, you don't bring a loincloth to a musket fight.

Coming up next: The Bataan Death March!

"Give peace a chance! Or at least stand still!"

Tragically, the Zulus attempt to invade Canada dressed as white college students fell through after brandishing their spears and shouting "Kunta Kente!"

Thus ended the "Charge of the Lightheaded Brigade".

And as those thirty zulu impersonators were slaughtered, the crowd looked on in abject... boredom.

downvoters will be shot at dawn...

Meanwhile, a group of students dressed as cowboys inexplicably wound up in a war between the Germans.

Who knew genocide could be so much fun!

Lord of The Flies 2: Stranded in St. Agnes.

Due to budget cuts, Mrs. Lloyd's fourth grade class was tragically unable to afford the supplies necessary to defend themselves against the much better equipped sixth graders.

The town of Redding has an unusual way "graduating" students who've been held back multiple times.

Ok. Slow clap, everyone

Hey, Paul Revere, what the hell, man?

"Think you used enough bullets there, Butch?"

The North Pole Militia didn't care if the kids were good or bad. They defend their boundaries without prejudice.

The movie "Zulu" had an impressive post-production budget.

they only wanted coffee and a Danish...

"Score 1 for the inbred monarchy!"

Days later, Santa sent better shields to all the good little Zulu boys and girls.

There's a bunch of people who could really benefit from some good conditioner.

The next float in the parade is called "Small Pox blankies to Indians."

The Roy's Drift Massacre reenactment was seen as a healthy way for parents and their children to let off some steam until a few of the soldiers started bayonetting the survivors.

Even deadlier than the line to buy the XBox Kinect was the line to return it.

Nothing pays tribute to the death of a proud culture like middle-class white kids.

The massacre of Busker Hill were serve as a rallying cry for buskers around the world to rise up and juggle for freedom

Sadly, the fun of wearing period costumes was not enough to prevent much of the crowd from succumbing to "small town parade boredom."

"Looks like the building over there is on fire." "What did you say Roy?" "I said, Fire!"