Other Craptions

Sure, I have a low sperm count, but in my case, quality trumps quantity.

How lesbians see men.

Hey babe... do you asexually fertilize your larval planula polyp here often?

"Hey Bill, these are for the Gaga concert." - "Props?" - "No, relatives."

Insiders say that the District 9 sequel will boast an even lower budget that the original.

Shake my hand! ... that's not my hand ... but don't stop.

This is what happens to sea monkeys with proper nurturing for 30 years

There isn't enough piss in the world to soothe the sting she's about to get.

Hanging out at a nude beach makes me all nervous system, too.

JellyPhish has stoner groupies too.

Meanwhile... at the sperm bank Christmas party...

Not the "mushroom kingdom" I was looking for. Sorry.

Sheri getting stung while shaking hands didn't help things; But the intergalactic war with the space jellyfish could have been avoided if Bob hadn't then peed on their crown prince.

Now THOSE are what I call cosplayers!

Burning man? Just wait until we sting him.

Dammit those guys, always showing me up. Well Jerry and Bob can HAVE her. I'm going to look for a woman with deeper orifices ANYWAY.

Good thing Kevin decided to tune that g-string...or no one would be dancing!

"hey you big strong squid... if you want some action talk to my pimp over there"

Glorx: Should we tell the Earthlings they look like our sperm? Phleznar: Be polite, Glorx.

Behind the scenes on a tentacle porn shoot

When Chuck Norris cums, it becomes a national monument

All is forgiven, Furries. Come back!

Splorb, sensing that Cynthia is about to announce she's pregnant from last week's tentacle orgy, slyly makes his way toward the ship.

"That guy in the hat over there said he can make macaroni for us."

So we crash-landed on this planet, died, and became ghosts. Does that mean we're not allowed to try to get a phone number??

"Those Semen are always causing trouble on shore leave. Jeff go get the Kleenex!"

The illegal aliens continued to look for work after discovering that they just weren't cut out for operating even the most basic farming equipment.

A group of previously undiscovered sea creatures on the run from the Iron Chef.

Okay, I see the mountain majesty in the background, the guy in the picadilly hat is obviously the fruited plain, but WTF is going on in the foreground?

She might be able to teach them Bob Fosse moves, but they're not going to be able to manage jazz hands.

Meeting his parents made her nervous enough; Amy still hadn't gotten the courage to introduce her own parents to her Japanese boyfriend.

You could always tell who was falling behind in "Eating Disorder Rehab".

The black ones have even longer tentacles...

"Hi, I'm Pete and I like to party." "Hello, I'm Pete and I also like to party." "Greetings, I go by the name of Pete and I like to party as well."

Look, I know it SOUNDS painful, but this is Germany. You'll probably never be on another vacation here. Live a little!

You know the economy has gotten bad when even the ghosts are panhandling.

anual area51 get-together

ALL TOGETHER NOW! - One of these things is not like the others...One of these things just doesn't belong.....

The project to raise awareness of starvation was as misguided as it was well intended

"OMG! You guys... can you believe the guy in the GREEN hat just hit on me? What a weirdo.

i will name him squishy, and he will be my squishy. Come 'ere Squishy!!

"global warming has gone out of hand... there was a sea here yesterday": explaind the jelly fish

My biggest fear has come true: All those blown up plastic soldiers from my childhood returning for revenge!

With Scientology I shed the extra baggeage and now i am just a wisp of my former self.

There's something fishy her. No, wait, not exactly fishy...

Thanks E-harmony!

Extreme Bukake in super slow motion

To combat impotence, scientist have developed super sperm that can get a woman pregrant from a thousand meters

Excuse me, bipedal humanoid. Do you have any Grey Poupon?