"After he unwrapped it, our little Tommy was so excited; he said it was the best gift ever. And since then, he has spent more time playing with the box it came in than with this $2000, 12 hours to build, piece of shit."
"I swear to God! If that jackass doesn't stop slamming that stick on the ground and yelling "Thou shall not pass.", I'm going to show him that the one thing on here that isn't fake is the roof mounted death-ray.