Other Craptions

If that's what they put out in the open, I'd hate to see what they think they have to keep under the tarp.

"Take the bull by the horns" was just step 1. You don't want to hear about the other steps.

There once was a bull so crass, his balls were made out of brass. When he knocked them together, they played Stormy Weather, and lightning shot out of his ass. (I'm just curious how many down votes a limerick will get.)

I don't know what the Chicago Bulls are planning, but it's going to be the best half-time show ever.

And then I saw her. Between the bull's leg and testicle, our eyes locked, and it was love at first sight.

I know why they're taking this statue down. It's got a huge crack in it.

"For God's sake honey, you can't compare his to mine. That's like comparing apples and oran...I mean grapes and watermelons."

His legs are kind of short because I ran out of bronze doing the balls.

Tired of the many golden calves running everywhere, they finally decided to get the golden bull fixed.

Having learned exactly the wrong lesson from the mistakes of the past, the citizens of Babylon knew a mere golden calf wouldn't cut it this time around.

It's impossible to write a caption when you're furiously masturbating.

Sure you're smiling now, but just wait until they attach his giant gold penis and jealousy sets in.

Winner of the Golden Globes

Excuse me, do you know where Christine O'Donnell's house is? I've got a special delivery.

Your move, Moses.

The running bulls of Pamplona were no match for Miguel and his mighty chainsaw.

Not Pictured: Babe the Blue Ox holding a lighter just off screen.

That poor woman is caught between a hock and a hard place.

"Shit, Mike! Turn it over! Do we want everyone to know our secret to truly great milk?"

I prefer the standard bike racks.

When the golden calf grew up to be the golden bull, the Israelites choose to sacrifice it to God and enjoy a feast of golden brisket, golden ribs and golden Rocky Mountain oysters.

It's going to be the window display in the new China Shop. What, you find that ironic?

You need to take the bull by the balls! Seriously. I don't even care where you take it, just get it out of here...

Things are getting pretty bad when you can't even score with a human statue.

There's part of the King Midas story that they leave out of the children's books.

Goldfinger didn't always point blame in the right direction.

The Crying Game II: I can't believe you fell for it again

Merrill Lynch went belly up.

"That reminds me, I must get some meatballs for tonight's dinner..."

Oh boy, are the Israelites in for it now.

You need to go the extra step if you want to introduce Rocky Mountain oysters to an upscale market.

Salvador Dali requested BMW make a few custom changes to his sedan before it was shipped.

At long last, investors can enjoy the full teabagging experience

No, I didn't "suck from the golden teat" growing up.. Not exactly, anyway.

Is it a bull market or a bare market?

On set of the new porn "Animal Farm: Four legs good, blue balls bad"

Finally! The recipe for Wall Street Oysters!

Never Mind The Bullocks

Mmmm. Look at those ribs Martha! It's not the ribs I'm looking at John.

Bill Clinton might not've got a statue in his honor built yet, but they've already started building the statue of Hillary.

"...and the beef jerky we make from it is high in iron!"

If you build it, it will come.

Meanwhile, in Spain, they're celebrating the Annual Running of the Jack O' Lanterns.

I'm down voted, therefore I'm funny.

"This is Bob Barker reminding you to have your bull checked for a hernia."

This is a feast for down voters. You can kiss my you-know-what!

More complaints about the Bulishlt display..

It literally takes brass balls to park in Dick Cheney's spot.

Barcelona municipal employees start laying some serious pipe.