Other Craptions

Tonight, on Middle Earth's got talent...

"OMG, Doug, galvanized annealed steel spoons weren't around in 1327! You look like SUCH a tool!"

His Armor is +1 against Gravy, and has a 10% resistance to stain-based attacks.

And we finally see the band Neck Face.

Sir Not-Getting-Laid-Much and Lady Doesn't-Put-Out-At-All.

Pictured: The best birth control invented ... ever.

"Isn't it ironic? My father told me that all I'd be good for is shoveling shit, and here I am, with only a spoon."

The last thing an unlucky hitchhiker sees.

Gary is very proud of the things doctors have removed from his colon.

Your hat looks like the back of a saddle... which is appropriate because you look like a horses ass.

This is no laughing matter kids. If you slack off in school, you too could end up just like me.

Detective Werner Spatz of Scotland Yard's Tableware Recovery unit holds the spoon, missing since Sunday. The dish that ran away with it remains at large.

I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes before photoshop

30 cows were harmed in the making of this picture.

Nice spoon. Now where are you hiding the 12-sided dice?

The lesser known fable 'Utensil and Gretel'.

Mr. Johnson, we regret to inform you that this is your Public Defender. Good luck with your case.

Hansel and Gretel: After the Gingerbread House.

I was indeed born with this, good sir, but it was not in my mouth.

FORK YOU ... oh, wait. Wrong prop.

Put a fork in him. He's dumb.

The Chunky Soup "Spoon" vs "Fork" conflict spans back many centuries.

No, they're not witches. Burn them anyway.

The collared shirt really adds to the outfit...

The fools said I'd never find a woman to date me. Who's laughing now. Who's laughing now. Well, they're still laughing, I guess

Because for some people, a fanny-pack just isn't lame enough.

First, the feasting! Later, the Rutting of the Nerds!

"...and this is the 43rd thing they pulled out of my ass!"

Jake's thinking: "This great picture of me will be all over the Internet!" Mary's thinking: "As soon as we get home, I'm going to google 'divorce lawyer.'"

..and the dork ran away with the spoon.

Few people know that open mike night began in the Renaissance.

Nope, that spoon is nowhere near big enough to dig your life out of the hole it is currently in.

Shame is a barrel without any bottom.

The Packers have Cheese-Heads. This is what we have in Canada. (And we don't even have organised sports.)

Poker players go to amazing lengths to hide their tells.

This gentleman shows classics signs of a common North American disease: Pussy Whipicus Maximus.

Where will you be when castor oil strikes?

He can bend spoons, but not with his mind.

"Next item up for bids, Lindsay Lohan's coke spoon..."

If these are the special effects they're employing, I can see why The Hobbit is never gonna make it to production.

Looks like there was a big sale at Hobby Lobby. Score!

With some simple wardrobe choices, you too can protect yourself from spoon attack

Oh please. Everyone knows about the electric spoon gag.

I had something entirely different in mind when I heard the words "Tea Party."

"I can bend this spoon, with my MIND! Now, just focus on the tip of your nose...no, that's not the feeling of your wallet being lifted from your pocket, relax..."

Hi, and welcome to Dismal Land...

Ye Olde Village Proctologyste

When yoghurt starts falling from the sky, I'll have the last laugh!