Other Craptions

"Hello, 911? Yeah, he's gone and got it stuck in a rock this time."

"That's ok Pluto... You'll always be FAR more than a planetoid to me..."

The Russian "rock, paper scissors" championship gets off to a great start...

There's a better way to kill ants, but you can't tell Sven anything when he's drunk.

"I passed this damn kidney stone, and I am going to KEEP it!"

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.... eventually.

"Hey, when the Don wants a friggin' Brontosaurus omelet, the Don gets a friggin' Brontosaurus omelet."

From that day on, Lance's wife was never able to complain about the pain of childbirth in his presence.

Polish hit men watch for their victim to pass by on the street below.

Just out of frame, there's another guy fighting a pair of scissors.

It wasn't pleasant...but he breastfed it until it was old enough to eat solid foods.

Sisyphus finally had a coaching squad, but he still couldn't crest the hill.

The egg, warmed by Ivan's love, soon hatched. The demon-spider babies ate well that night.

How baby pebbles are made...

Rocks... don't take them for granite.

In the "Rock, Paper, Scissors" game, this is known as The Nuclear Option.

BrokenBack Mountain

"Hey guys, why don't we use this forklift parked back here?"

9 months later, we have The Thing

Jesus Dave, it's just a walnut!

Payback time for scissors.

Why yes, they ARE members of a labor union. How'd you guess?

A rolling stone gathers no moss, but somehow it picked up this douchebag...

Buster Gonad and his Obscenely Huge Testicle.

Downvoter Hell.

An epidemic of floating rocks has broken out all over Eastern Europe. Shirtless men have been employed to try and hold them down.

A scene from the foreign film 'Das Jackass.'

Angus invents rock and roll.

Where's your paper now! WHERE IS IT!

Hey, we said "Let's fucking rock", not.....

Best. Easter egg. EVER.

Wow, if you care for your pet rock, it actually can grow pretty big.

Jeff had to see for himself what, if anything, the Rock was cooking.

People assumed something else when Vasily said he "loved the Stones."

I will now illustrate Mel Gibson's career by using this hill and boulder...

Gary (center) displays the gall stone he passed last year, much to the horror and dismay of his friends.

"Dude, you can't brace it. You need to pick ALL of it up with your dick,"

Rock, paper, this guy...

Let he who is without hernia cast the first stone.

I guess he's into stoner chicks...

Try to beat this... Paper!

Someone should let the Polish Olympic team know that curling is an ice sport.

Well ok, but where's the Casbah?

Those about to rock are doing it wrong.

This is why I don't ask a shirtless doctor for a prescription for suppositories.

I don't know, Gustav... Sigourney Weaver said you should stay away from that thing...

"Are you sure this will cure my herpes?" "Well not if you keep asking about it"

The crowd nearly doubled in size once his eggs started hatching.

"Dude, why you still with that granite, when there is all that fine-ass marble out there?"