Other Craptions

I was underwhelmed to discover that all he does is make coffee

What Republicans think gay marriage will lead to, somehow.

It didn't matter how many drills were attached to his body, Titanius still couldn't fill the hole in his heart

The Colonoscopy Bot: horrifically saving lives everywhere

Drill Sergeants are fucking scary where I'm from.

Early models of the terminator were easy to spot.

The "Toy Story" franchise has taken a very dark turn.

"Honey! The babysitter is here!"

They all laughed at me in shop class, but we'll see who's laughing now!

Despite his clever imagination, Ben was always going to be a rapist.

Those lifelike machine noises you hear are actually generated by Eddie Winslow from the Police Academy movies.

All it wants is love...maybe.

"We're off to see the wizard, the murderous Wizard of Oz!"

It's always easy to tell which parents helped their kids with their science projects.

The gritty reboot of Teletubbies did better than expected at the box office.

The Tin Man was sick of Dorothy's shit, so he got some additional upgrades besides just the heart.

The tax man cometh.

Dorothy never did find out what happened to Toto, but she had her suspicions.

The earlier Big Daddy models did not command much respect in Rapture

How to kill it? Just point to the face and say "You've got something there"

Even when cops try to infiltrate a steampunk convention, they try too hard.

HoboCop, made completely from crap found at a junk yard

His latest victim? That women in pink is bending forward for a reason.

"Timmy, if you visit any of those sites I've told you not to, this will come and get you."

Drillbert is so awesome. I'd give him another high five if I still had a hand.

About time killer robot fans got their own parade

Isn't it amazing that we all look like that inside?

The Dental Hygienist for kids who don’t brush

You can reallly see the cold soulless glare... Kind of like Charlie Sheen's eyes....

He actually was a hand model before the accident

Advances in proctological technology have been both swift and terrifying.

Mega-tard.

I don't understand why everyone is so afraid of my washing machine.

Bender the robot was never the same once he started tweaking meth.

With every failed effort to assimilate human culture, the Terminator died just a little bit more inside.

In it's later years, SkyNet developed quite the sense of humor -- especially when they were "screwing" you...

Terminator 6: Rise of the Retarded.

The good news is, in the future dentists travel door to door. The bad news is...

There's more than one way to get a bank loan

How to Get in Front of Any Line 102

Bizarro Terminator went forward in time and killed John Conner's Great grandson, which really did not cause much to happen and thus a sequel was never made.

I swear, if the frickin' director says, "Hey, Sam Raimi started with low budgets, too!" ONE MORE goddamn time, he's going to be dislodging this thing from his slacks, SAG bylaws be damned...

When the Tinman finally got a heart and the ablility to feel he realized he despised the inferior human race.

Ralph's costume was perhaps not entirely historical correct for the Medieval reenactment battle, but he nevertheless won the whole thing without problems.

No riot police? Call this guy.

Murdertron3000 halted in his tracks, analyzing true love for the first time

Who knew that the only way to defeat him was lining up a crowd in parade-watching formation while ignoring him?

Without makeup, Dick Cheney is surprisingly handsome.

"Well, Jack, all the other BP plans have failed, so why the fuck WOULDN'T this work?