Other Craptions

"Because fuck shoveling my driveway, that's why."

Finally, a solution to tailgating.

You kids shut up back there, I WILL battle the laws of physics in a futile attempt to turn this thing right around.

If I wanted a car whose rear end bursts into flames, I'd drive a Ford Pinto!

You should see the bong we installed in the VW van.

So this guy is basically compensating for having a vagina right?

Wile E Coyote finally gave up on catching the roadrunner and just decided to run the bastard down once and for all.

"Just try and put a banana in this tailpipe -- ASSHOLE!!"

The German space program.

An engine like that renders brakelights pretty much useless, don't you think?

Thanks VWiagra...

Prick probably still won't signal

Goes from 0 to Mach 1 in the time it takes you to read this.

Traffic Cop- "No, I stopped you because there's no license plate"

Now you can get to the gay bar five times as fast.

Here at VW, our motto is "you can blow it out your fucking ass!"

Mine's bigger.

I had to have it neutered because it wouldn't stop humping Jettas.

67 days into the black gold problem and were looking at this?

And WHO killed the electronic car?!

Yes your extremely phallic car may attract some girls, but now you have no back seat to do them in.

I told ya "good luck getting parts for your fucking VW" but did you listen?

It's about to boldly go where no Bug has gone before.

"The U.S. Supreme Court, in another surprise judgement, has handed down their ruling that executions can be both cruel AND inhumane, as long as they are 'AWESOME'."

The new Volkswagen Beetle: We don't take shit from anyone.

Volkswagon: It's ugly, but it gets you there.

Get over it, Jesse James, you're NOT getting Sandra back no matter WHAT the fuck you build!

Introducing the New Volkswagon Turbocharged Penis.

The Germans still haven't given up on going to the moon.

I want to go to THAT driving school

Oh Dick Darstardly, the shennanigans you get up to

Acme....we attach rockets to anything.

Some transformers are built to be pornstars.

Looks like Herbie's been hittin' the 'roids.

That's a first, a Volkswagon car making me feel inadequate.

The Backseat-Driver Ejector Cannon: Perfect for jerkwads who insist on telling you how to drive.

If Herbie fucked the Millenium Falcon

Ok, I'm gonna need Scotty in the back when I'm driving

Question: How do we market the V.W. bettle to men? Answer: attach a rocket booster shaped like a giant a wang

Dial 9-1 and leave the line open, we're going for a ride!

BP thought they might just rebuild their cars to simply pour out gas - while they're at it

Ron Jeremy's car is awesome

"Fuck the force, Luke. Use whatever THAT thing is."

We'll be there in 30 minutes or it's free.

This is why global warming exists.

Nocturnal Ommisions

Don't get excited, it's still just a 4-cylinder.

I have no idea. How fast WAS I going, officer?

Volkswagen- 1, NASA Shuttle Program- 0